Don't Forget About Forever
by soccer6
Summary: Tatiana and James were the best of friends living the good life in New York City up until James moved to California to pursue his dreams of becoming an actor/singer. Eight years later, they haven't talked at all. But one trip to CA can change their friendship forever. They start to fall in love, but will it last forever?
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1**

It was a nice summer August day in New York City. The breeze felt soothing and relaxing with the cars passing by and honking out on the streets. The sun was beaming down; high over our heads as my best friend James and I were playing tag.

My short little legs were moving as fast as they could to get him, but for a six year old, he was fast.

I was a year younger than him and would be going into first grade this year.

"James, it's not fair! I'm not playing anymore!" I complained as I stomped to a deck chair and sat down with a frowned face and crossed arms.

"What's wrong sweetheart?" my mom asked placing her hand on my shoulder.

Our moms were the best of friends ever since middle school. They were like blood sisters doing everything together from shopping to cooking to traveling. They even went to Europe just the two of them for three months. Our families grew up close to each other and did almost everything together. Today was exactly one of those days of them catching up, minus our dads working.

My mom took hold of my hands and bent down in front of me. I was frustrated with myself that I couldn't tag him. When we played this game I could never catch him. It always ended in my complaints.

I could see James in the back laughing his head off which only got me more upset.

"It's not fair. He's faster than me," I whined to my mom.

James' mom came out carrying the burgers and placed them on the table. Our mothers decided to take off today to spend some time together.

"Don't worry," James' mom began. "You'll be faster than him some day and he'll be the one chasing you," she continued.

"Really?" I asked looking up at her and she nodded.

"Tati," James called out.

He called me by my nickname ever since we could talk as little kids.

"Don't stop trying," he said running towards me.

He stopped in front of me panting and catching his breath. I was upset with him so I faced the other way. Our moms just laughed and went inside to get the rest of the food.

"Tats," he said trying to make me laugh. "Tator tots," he called out and I couldn't help but to giggle.

"Okay guys, food is ready," my mom called out and we scrambled over to the deck table to win our spots. Like always, we sat together. We were having spaghetti and hamburgers today.

"I don't like meatballs," I whispered to him.

"I'll eat them for you," he whispered back.

I secretly handed it to him under the table because if my mom found out, she would yell at me. Giving each other what we didn't like was our little system that we had worked out with food. If I didn't like something on my plate, I would give it to him and he would do the same. It all worked out in the end.

But that was just a memory from my past.

I go to Penn State University and I recently completed my second year of college. I haven't spoken to James in over eight years. He pursued his dreams of becoming an actor and singer when he moved to California at the age of fourteen.

I remembered that day perfectly.

It was the summer of 2004 when I walked over to his house to do our summer school work on a Thursday afternoon. We wanted to get the work done earlier because in August our families liked to vacation together every year. This year, however, they didn't say anything about going on vacation which only made me wonder why we weren't doing anything this year. James has been acting strange lately though, same with my parents. Almost as if everyone knows something I don't.

When I walked inside his house, I found boxes everywhere and stuff out of their place. His picture frames when he was a baby weren't up or the decorations on the tables weren't there either.

He hadn't said anything about this at all.

"What are these boxes for?" I asked eying each one of them curiously. I was suspicious. They looked like boxes for moving, but James would never leave. If he were, he would've told me earlier.

"Um, my mom is doing something," was all he said.

I didn't continue to question him. We simply continued doing our work together. I badly wanted to know what the boxes were for. It bugged me for the next following days.

A week later, I found my answer.

I saw the sign on his front lawn that read: FOR SALE. My heart skipped a beat and my mind went blank. He was moving and hadn't told me anything about it.

I immediately ran over to his house and rang the doorbell. I waited impatiently for the door to open. One minute later, James opened the door. He stood before me in jeans and a green shirt, his hair brushed slightly to one side.

"You're moving?" I asked pointing to the sign planted in his lawn.

He looked over to the sign as if he forgot and then slowly nodded looking to the ground.

"I'm moving to LA to pursue my dreams. I got into this school and my mom said she'd let me go," he explained.

"Oh," was all I could muster to say.

I should have congratulated him or given him a hug or done something. But for some reason, we both knew it wasn't really good news to celebrate. Maybe for him it was, but finding out that he was leaving was like getting stabbed by a needle a million times straight in the heart. He's my best friend. The only one who ever really knew me. No one other than him understands me. Why did he have to leave?

"Yeah, your mom and my mom talked about it. I thought you already knew," he said and I shook my head. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine," I told him, but I was sad, broken-hearted.

Nothing about this situation was fine. I was almost in tears. No one ever wants to lose their best friend after all the times they've spent together.

"Listen I have to keep packing," he said. "We can hang out tomorrow."

I looked up to him, but found it hard to keep my eyes on him.

"When do you leave?" my voice cracked and my eyes began to tear up. I wiped them away and stared up at the sky to avoid any other tears from dripping down my face.

"Next week," he answered.

I nodded and slowly walked away. Only a week left to do everything. Why was I the last one to find out? At the last minute too.

"I'll call you later tonight," he called out and then closed his door.

As I walked back to my house the wind started picking up, making my hair fly everywhere. I took deep breaths in and out to calm myself from crying where everyone can see me.

The trees were swaying side to side and the leaves were flying off the branches. Disconnecting from the roots that once used to keep a strong hold on them like best friends do. James was the leaf who was flying far away from me.

A storm was coming. I wrapped my thin sweater around me to keep me warm, but it was no use. Out in the distance, I heard thunder rumbling and saw a flash of lightning. I quickly ran to my house before I could get wet.

When I closed the door, the downpour began and I rushed straight to my room to cry out the pain I was feeling. I buried my face in my pillow and cried myself to sleep that night. I even skipped dinner. I wasn't hungry either.

"Tati! Dinner is ready!" my mom called out.

"I'm not hungry!" I yelled and continued to cry.

My parents probably knew that I had just found out and that's why they didn't bother me that night. When were they going to tell me anyway? I had a right to know.

The next day, James came over around nine in the morning. My parents had to work so they weren't here. My mom always left around nine, so she must've let him in.

"Tati," I heard him calling out my name.

I shifted in my bed and turned the other way, wanting more sleep.

I felt him sit on the edge of my bed and place his hand on my waist. I slowly opened my eyes and turned to face him.

"Morning," he smiled and I felt like crying again because I knew in six days, that was something I wouldn't be seeing ever again until God knows how long. I swallowed and held my tears from pouring out all over again.

"Hey," my voice sounded hoarse, probably from all that crying last night.

"Your mom let me in," he said and I nodded.

I sat up in bed and he removed his hand. I hadn't realized I was extremely hungry until my stomach growled.

He laughed.

"Someone's hungry," he said getting up from my bed.

"I didn't eat last night."

He gave me a weird look.

"Why?" he asked.

"I fell asleep early," I lied.

"No wonder why you didn't pick up."

I remembered him saying that he would call, but I probably didn't hear my phone ring.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Apologizing. I should've told you earlier that I was moving," I looked to the bed sheets as he continued speaking. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine," I said flatly.

But it really wasn't. I should've been the first to know, not the last.

"Do you want to spend the day together?" he asked.

"Don't you have to pack?"

"I can do that tomorrow. Want to help?"

"Sure."

"Cool. Then lets go eat somewhere," he said taking my hand and pulling me out of my bed.

He pulled me downstairs out the door like a dog does when going on a walk.

"Where are we going? I'm still in my PJ's," I reminded him.

"So?" he questioned.

"I'm not going to walk into some place dressed in my PJs," I said.

He laughed letting go of me.

I quickly ran inside and changed into jean shorts and a Hollister shirt. I put on my sandals and put my hair in a high ponytail. I grabbed the house keys and locked the door. We walked down to Ihop and ate breakfast together. We both ordered pancakes and bacon, our favorite.

"Do you really have to go?" I asked.

He wiped the crumbs off the corner of his mouth with the napkin and waited to answer my question.

"Yeah," he answered quietly. "I'm kind of happy because I'm going to do something I've always wanted to do," he said.

"That's really nice," I said trying to be happy instead of gloomy.

We finished our food and walked down to New York Square. We walked around everywhere. Doing our normal stuff we always do when coming here. We walked in and out of stores trying on crazy hats that would make us laugh.

We got ice cream at Ben and Jerry's and eventually it would end up on our faces. James always won this competition because he was the first one to smush my face with his ice cream. But I got him back somehow.

When the sun was setting, we went back to my house up to my room. I opened the window and stepped out onto my roof. This was one thing we've always been doing since I was in fifth grade.

We carefully walked on the roof of my house, holding each other's hand to make sure we wouldn't fall. We sat down next to each other and watched the sunset in New York City. I laid my head on his shoulder and hugged his arm making our last memories.

When it got dark, we went back into my room and he hugged me goodbye.

"Do you just want to sleepover?" he asked.

"But we don't do that anymore."

"It doesn't matter."

I smiled, "Okay."

I packed my stuff and we went downstairs. My mom was there.

"Hey mom!" I said.

"Hey Tati, hey James," she said walking over to give us hugs. She eyed my bag. "Let me guess," she began as she walked back to cutting up the vegetables. "You want to sleep over James' house?"

I nodded my head. She quickly cut the vegetables. The knife hit the wooden board every second without missing a beat. She scraped off the cut up vegetables into a bowl and dried her hands on her apron she got with James' mom.

"Fine," she finally said and I went over to hug her.

"Thank you!" I said and she smiled.

She probably let me sleepover because she felt bad for not telling me earlier about James and them moving.

James and I walked out of my house and walked over to his. We watched a movie together on the couch. He put his arm around me and I laid my head on his chest wrapping my arm around his stomach. We watched the movie and ended up falling asleep on the couch. We looked like a couple, but we weren't. We were just two friends who were hanging out for probably the last time.

"James, Tati," James' mom called shaking us. "Go upstairs."

We got up and walked sleepily to James room. His bed could fit two people. I loved his bed because it was comfortable and nice. We slept together like good old times, him on one side and me on the other.

The rest of the week we hung out together. He slept over my house and I slept over his house. We alternated houses and did everything together the following days up until he left.

The day he was leaving, my parents and I walked over to their house. When we got there, everything was packed. The house was empty. Nothing was left and I just felt like crying even more.

When I saw James, he was sitting on the stairs with his head in his hands.

He looked up and our eyes met. My eyes were blurry from the tears already forming in my eyes. He stood up and walked over to me. James wrapped his arms around me and I buried myself into the crane of his neck as I sobbed on him. He soothed my hair and rubbed my back as he embraced and comforted me in his arms. I continued to sob.

"Okay lets get in the car," James' dad called and I slowly let go of James. We walked out and got in the car because we were taking them to the airport. My dad drove and James' dad rode shotgun. Our moms sat together discussing everything like best friends would do and James and I sat in the back.

"Can't believe I'm moving to Cali," James said flabbergasted.

"Yeah, it's really pretty over there," I said.

He noticed the sadness in my voice.

"I'll send you pictures on Facebook and we can Skype."

I smiled and nodded letting him know that I approved.

"Now I won't have my buddy to do homework with," I said and he laughed.

"I'm going to miss this place," he said looking out the window.

I exhaled and looked out the window too.

"You'll come back to visit right?" I asked suddenly and he turned to face me.

"Only if you come visit me," he said.

"Of course I will."

He smiled but it was a melancholy smile because now we were arriving at the airport. It was time for us to say goodbye.

We got out their luggage from the trunk and walked in the airport with them.

James' dad got the boarding tickets and now they were heading to security. My mom embraced her best friend as she cried on her shoulder. The dad's were playing the tough ones, but I knew they were sad inside.

I turned to face James.

He had his long arms already outstretched towards me. As if on cue, I ran into his arms and hugged him with all my might.

"I'm going to miss you my tator tots," he said in my ear, hugging me tighter.

I laughed softly, but my eyes were getting watery.

He let go and looked me in the eyes. He held my face in his hands wiping the tears off my face with his thumb.

"Hey, don't cry," he said and that's when I broke down completely.

He pulled me into his arms again and rubbed my back, comforting me. I cried hard against his chest not wanting him to leave. I didn't want him to go.

"You're going to make me cry now."

I laughed. "I'm going to miss you," I told him.

"I'm going to miss you too," he said.

"Promise you won't forget about me?"

"Promise," he said to me.

I hugged him one last time before he hugged my mom and dad. I did the same.

Once the hugging was all done, they got in line for security and just like snow disappears when spring arrives, they were gone, leaving everything behind.

Leaving everything just a memory.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2**

We've talked now and then, but it's not the same intimate relationship we used to have back in the days. He made new friends and took pictures with his new buds. He sent me some on Skype like he said he would and it brought a smile to my face every time I saw them.

But that stopped when I was in my junior year of high school. I didn't have time to do anything because of homework and I simply couldn't Skype or check the pictures he sent.

If I wasn't doing homework, I was sleeping.

Eventually, he stopped sending pictures and we finally grew apart. Disconnected from each other's lives forever. I hadn't seen or heard from him in five years.

He probably got busy with his auditions and I got busy with applying to colleges.

I made my new friends here in college and started my own life. College life was amazing. I partied when I could with my friends and of course I did a lot of studying. So far, college has been good. I'm studying to be a pediatrician because I love to work with little kids.

It was summer and I wasn't going on vacation this year. My parents said they used a lot of money to pay for my school so we wouldn't be going anywhere.

I just drove around in June and hung out with my boyfriend, Daniel, and friends in New York. Last weekend Daniel and I went to the movies.

Two days ago I went shopping with my friends Megan and Maria. We bought a lot of clothes and did our nails together. Even though I hadn't travelled anywhere this year, I've been having a lot of fun.

I started dating a guy named Daniel Frey. We met in college at a fraternity party his friend, Jerry who was Megan's boyfriend, was having. She invited me and I went along. Originally I planned on not going because I didn't really know anyone and I was scared I'd become the third wheel and look like a loser, but I started talking to Daniel.

We both fell in love with each other instantly. We clicked and ever since then, we've hung out almost every day. We've been dating for nine months and it's been really fun with him.

He'd take me on romantic dinner cruises in the Hudson River and on occasional random days, he'd take me down to the beach to watch the sunsets, which were pretty and relaxing. We'd stand in the sand holding hands while the wind blew sand on our faces. I would feel the mist of the ocean sprinkling on my face and take in the fish scented smell of the ocean. Sometimes we went into the water with our clothes on because we are a crazy couple.

Daniel and I hung out everyday. My mom didn't like him much and my dad was somewhat okay with him. They didn't one hundred percent approve of him, but I still loved him.

This year for summer, Daniel was going to the beach in two days for two weeks with his friends. He invited me, but I said no because I had to take care of some college stuff first. I told him that I would go afterwards.

The day Daniel left to the beach down in Maryland, I arrived home from his house. We had hugged goodbye and I watched his car leave with his friends. When I entered my house, my parents were waiting for me. I came inside and closed the door.

They were grinning as I settled my bag on the couch.

"Hey guys," I said.

They still kept grinning and I was confused.

"Why are you guys smiling?" I asked.

"Tati, your dad and I found some extra money and we're going to California," my mom said happily.

I blinked realizing that this year, there would be traveling. It wouldn't be a boring summer after all. Not that it was. It just felt weird to not travel because we had done it every year. It was like a tradition. Each year since they day I was born; we've travelled to many different locations, sometimes overseas and other times across land.

I stood in my family room hearing probably the most exciting news ever. I've always wanted to go to California ever since James sent me his pictures. I was kind of jealous. Now I could finally see the beauties of CA. I'd never been to California my whole life so this was pretty exciting for me.

"When are we going?" I asked.

"In three days for a month," my dad said and with that, I rushed to my room throwing my suitcase on my bed and rummaging around my dressers finding clothes to bring on my trip. I packed almost my entire closet leaving a few things behind. I was almost done when my phone rang.

"Hey."

"Hey!" It was Daniel. "Guess what?"

"What?" he asked.

"I'm going to California!" I yelled through the phone.

"Whoa! That's great! Wait you're not coming to the beach then?" he asked.

"No. I'm sorry," I said.

"It's alright. Are you going to bring me back something," he asked and I could tell he was smiling at the other end.

"Of course I will," I said as I put the last clothes in my suitcase. "But you have to bring me stuff back from the beach too," I reminded him.

"Why wouldn't I?" he said and we laughed.

"Tati! Dinner!" my mom yelled from downstairs.

"I'll call you later Dan. I have to go eat," I said.

"Okay, bye. Love you," he said.

I collapsed on my bed and stared at the ceiling. Going to California could only mean one thing. And that was to see our old friends. But for what occasion? There has to be a reason why we're going to California. And then it hit me. James birthday was in a week. How could I have forgotten about James' birthday?

I always called him every year on his birthday. Last year for his 21st birthday, I made a phone call and I sang happy birthday to him. He was laughing and we almost seemed connected again. Almost. We only talked for a few minutes because around the time of his birthday, I was travelling. Last year I went to Rome, Italy. It was beautiful and I took many pictures. I even brought my friends along, Megan and Maria.

We were finally going to celebrate it together in California for the first time since eight years. Could I have asked for a better summer?

I went downstairs and ate my food really quickly so I could finish packing my other stuff. This was all very exciting news to me. I rushed back up stairs and packed all I would need. When I was done, I closed my eyes with a smile on my face falling down on my bed. I drifted off to a deep sleep.

The next days passed by in a blink of an eye. Before I knew it, I was boarding a plane and flying to CA.

"Who's going to meet us there?" I asked my mom.

"Our friends," she smiled and I smiled too.

I knew whom she meant.

I fell asleep on the plane and when we got there, I was tired. I got off the plane with my carry-on suitcase in my hand and my backpack draped around my shoulder. I was eager to see our friends standing on the other side of the wall. I walked out of the security check and looked around everywhere for them.

Then we found them, or my mom did. She ran to James' mom and they embraced so tightly, it looked like they were never going to let go. Two friends reunited at last. All I needed was my friend.

I began to scan the airport looking for James. I was afraid that he hadn't come when suddenly, I saw him. I almost didn't recognize him. At first I thought he was just a random guy who was stalling around, but then I realized it was really he.

He changed a lot. His hair, his body, which by the way looked muscular and stronger, and everything had changed. But it was the same hazel eyes that never changed since the beginning. I dropped my bag and suitcase and ran over to James with a big smile displayed on my face.

"James!" I yelled excitedly.

"Tati!" he said equaling my tone.

I ran into his big muscular arms as he picked me up and spun me in a circle. We hugged for a really long time holding onto each other like we never really left. He put me down but kept me in his arms.

"Wow, you've changed a lot," he said looking at my new features.

He grew so much taller than before. I reached him to about his chest now. I had to look all the way up.

"And you did too! When did you grow twenty feet?" I exaggerated and he laughed.

"I'm not that tall," he said.

I gave him a look telling him he was and we both laughed.

We all gathered our stuff and picked up our luggage.

"I'll carry that for you," James said taking my suitcase and bag off my shoulder.

"Thanks!" I said and we walked to the car.

James and I settled in the back while our moms sat in front of us and our dads rode together in the front. It reminded me of the gloomy day eight years ago. We sat in the same exact order.

"I've seen you on TV like a gazillion of times," I told him.

He nodded and smiled.

"Congrats dude," I added with a small push on his arm.

"Thanks," he said.

I felt the strong muscle underneath the palm of my hand and was impressed with how much buffer he got.

Not going to lie, but he was hot. My best friend from my childhood looks very attractive with his brown hair and pearly whites. Is it okay to think that your friend is hot when you have a boyfriend? I don't know, but he was really hot.

"How is it to sing and record your shows?" I asked.

"It's tiring to be honest, but it's so worth it."

I nodded and wondered if he had forgotten all the times we spent together for fourteen years. Our friendship was something no one could ever understand. It'd be disappointing if he forgot all about it.

"How's college?" he asked.

"It's great. The people there are awesome. My new friends, they're all really great," I answered and he nodded smiling.

I kept looking at his white pearly teeth.

"What? So I'm not your friend anymore?" he joked and I laughed.

"No, you're my best friend. No one can replace you," I said trying not to make him feel bad.

Even though we were talking like nothing changed since the last time, it felt awkward talking to him because I had no clue as to what we should talk about.

He laughed and we just looked at each other not knowing what else to say. What were we supposed to talk about now?

There were these pauses were we just looked at each other and it resulted in just laughing with each other and looking away.

My phone vibrated in my pocket and I took it out to find a text from Daniel.

It read: _Hey babe, hope you had a nice flight. Love you. Call me when you have time. Miss you!_

I smiled at the text. I responded: _Thanks! I just landed and I'm really tired. I'll call you later tonight. Love you!_

And I put my phone away.

"Who was that?" James asked.

"My boyfriend."

"You have a boyfriend?" he asked shocked.

"Yeah," I didn't notice the joking tone in his voice.

"What? The Tatiana has a boyfriend?"

That's when I knew he was teasing me.

"Shut up." I laughed.

"Since when?"

"Since last year, almost. It's been nine months. His name is Daniel and we met at a party. He's really nice," I explained to him.

James just nodded his head in a cool way.

"What about you? I've seen the pictures. You drinking and partying," I mentioned to him and he laughed.

"Yeah, but that was like five years ago. When I was like sixteen. Now I'm too busy to do the normal stuff."

"Well you stopped sending the pictures."

"Sorry. I meant to, but I got busy."

"It's alright. I wouldn't have had time to get on Skype either way. School had me pretty much busy too."

"So we're even then," he said and I nodded.

We arrived to his house.

"Wait, so we're staying at your house?" I asked James.

"Well this is my parents house. I have my own house down in San Diego," he said.

"So we won't be spending time together?" I asked.

I was bummed now. The only reason why I was happy to be coming here was because of my best friend. But he's not even going to stay here?

"No, I'm staying here for the time that you'll be staying," he said and I got excited.

"Really?" I asked and he nodded.

"You thought I wasn't going to spend time with my best friend?" he said smiling.

"Kind of," I mumbled.

I wasn't paying much attention to my surroundings when we were driving partially because I was distracted by James' hair and smile.

When I stepped onto the black smooth paved driveway, I found myself staring at a long road leading to a tall golden gate. Each side had huge grass areas and I couldn't believe it. I turned around and found the house. I stood before a white mansion that had four pillars and a stairway up to the door.

"This is your parent's house?" I asked in amaze as James came to stand by my side.

"Where'd you get all the money?"

The wind was blowing and my hair got in my face. I tucked it behind my ear.

"My job. They used to live in a smaller house, but I gave them money to live in this one," he explained and I nodded. "Want to go check it out?" he asked.

"Yeah!" I yelled excitedly.

"Hey mom. I'm going to show her around," he said.

"Okay, we'll be inside in a minute," she said.

We both ran up the stairs and he opened the door. I walked in to find a golden chandelier hanging above my head high in the ceiling. In front of me was the stairs to the second floor. To my left was the living room and to my right was the dining room. Everything looked so modern.

I found the family room, which was behind the stairs. There were brown soft couches and a coffee table in the middle. They had a plasma TV and the windows were made of glass. I looked to their backyard and found the pool.

"Are you serious?" I asked still amazed.

"Yeah, we can go swimming when ever you want," he said.

"Tonight!" I faced him to see if he approved.

"Alright." he said and

He led me to the kitchen, which was also big. There was an island in the middle and a rectangular table next to the porch door. Everything in this house was rich with rich crème colors. The furniture was coffee brown and it looked really nice.

"So where am I sleeping?" I asked as we walked up the stairs.

He led me to a room with the sun shining brightly. The walls were painted aqua.

"I know it's your favorite color," he said.

"Wow, this room is really big," I said putting down my bag next to a two-seater couch against the wall.

There was a big white dresser with a square mirror. Next to the queen sized bed with light brown bed sheets, were two white nightstands.

I fingered the smooth quality of the furniture.

"Yeah. Hey, I got to go. I'll be back for dinner though," he said as he walked over to me.

I didn't really get the message that he wanted to hug me, so I stood in front of him looking like an idiot. He held his arms out and still, I didn't get the message.

"Aren't you going to…" he trailed off motioning with his arms to hug him.

"Oh!" I said laughing.

I could feel my face get really hot. I gave him a hug trying to hide my face from him. He was laughing as well which made me feel better.

"Alright, I'll see you later."

He walked out and I sat down on my bed.

I sighed and noticed a door that led outside behind the silky see through curtains. I walked over and pushed the curtains aside revealing a small balcony with two white deck chairs and a small circular glass table.

I opened the door and walked outside. It was about eighty degrees, but it felt so much hotter.

I saw James walk out and get in his car. He saw me and smiled. I waved and he waved back before getting in.

I hated the awkwardness there is between us. It shouldn't be like this. We were best friends since the day we were born. We were supposed to end up like our moms, two friends who were never separated, who always stayed the same. What happened to staying best friends?

Years ago, one late night, he was seven and I was six, we were outside lying in his backyard looking up at the sky. Of course we couldn't see the stars because New York is a city. Who's ever going to see stars? But it was one thing we always wanted to do. To go to the countryside and look up at the stars together as best friends.

As much as we traveled we never really got to enjoy one night under the stars because we were always vacationing in a city. And in cities, the stars aren't really visible due to all the lights of the buildings.

"We're going to be best friends forever," James said as he turned to face me.

"Forever? How long is that?" I asked.

"I don't know, but my mom says it's a really long time," he said and we both laughed. We stared up at the sky together. Like best friends do. We looked inseparable, but little did I know, forever doesn't always fit it's meaning.

When I got back from the airport the day he left, the tears I was holding in the car just exploded. I didn't want to cry in front of my parents because they would just cry along too, so I waited until I was home. Besides, I didn't want them to see me.

Once I arrived at my house, I quickly got out of the car and went straight to my room and cried. I cried and cried because I lost my best friend in the world. I felt lonely. I felt lost with out him by my side. We had always been there for each other, but now I had no one. No one to go to when I was troubled. He was gone. My best friend was no longer with me. And it was then that I realized, forever doesn't always last.

I walked back inside from the balcony finally having enough of the sun and went over to my bed. I sat down and exhaled. I laid back and fell asleep still tired from the flight.

When I woke up it was six in the afternoon. The sun was setting.

I looked out of the window and the sky was orange. It looked pretty.

I stayed in my room still lying in my bed staring at the beauty of the sky. I almost didn't hear my name being called from the doorway.

"Tats," someone said and I turned around to see James standing there.

"Hey!" I said.

I was happy to see him again even though I saw him about four hours ago.

"Dinner is ready," he said.

But he didn't leave my room yet.

"Your hair is a mess," he added and I felt stupid for not realizing it soon enough.

Of course it was a mess. I had just wakened up from my sleep. I felt embarrassed sitting on my bed with my hair everywhere in front of James. Why was I feeling this way though? He's only my friend.

I stood up and went to the mirror. He walked over to me and started to fix my hair. He flattened it out gently and ran his fingers softly through my hair. His touch felt nice and relaxing and I could almost fall asleep again.

I stood in front of him dumbfounded looking at him through the mirror. He was focused on fixing my hair so I had time to just look at him with out him knowing. He changed so much. Sadly, I wasn't there to see it happen.

Then I noticed him looking to my eyes, which only made me more nervous than I already was with his hands running through my hair. I could feel my back burning up. I looked up to him and he smiled to me. I thought it was cute and I smiled back but slowly looked away.

"There we go," he said as he added his little touch to my hair.

He kept his hands on the ends of my hair longer than he needed to.

"Thanks," I said looking back up at him.

He smiled. "Your welcome."

We didn't move. We just stood there looking at each other. His eyes bore into mine and suddenly I felt a strange pang in my chest and my stomach got butterflies, but why? We were standing so close to each other. His hands were still playing with the ends of my hair. He flashed me his perfect smile, which made me smile back at him. Before anything else could happen, not saying anything was going to happen, his mom appeared through the door.

"Guys, food's ready," she said looking from me to James and then back at me.

"Okay, thanks," I said and I moved around James.

He followed close behind, but my mind was racing. What was James doing? How was he doing it? Why was he doing it? Was I feeling something for James? No. He's my best friend. Or my old best friend. We're not like we used to be. And since that's true, I can't like James. Besides, I have a boyfriend. I can't cheat on Daniel.


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3**

I walked over to the dinner table and sat down. James sat in the chair next to mine.

"Same old traditions never die," he whispered.

I knew what he was talking about. He does remember his childhood. Our childhood. He always sat next to me when we ate dinner together. It was what we did up until he moved.

I smiled.

Tonight we were having chicken with rice and salad. Personally, I wasn't a fan of salad.

"Are you going to eat your salad?" James asked.

I looked at him and mouthed no. He laughed softly and I handed him my salad. He ate it happily.

When we were all done, we moved to the family room and we all sat down. James sat next to me and his mom sat on the other side.

"How are you sweetheart? How's New York?" she asked.

"Still the same," I answered.

"Are the Coopers still weird?" she asked and everyone laughed.

"You know they actually haven't done much. Either that, or we haven't been paying attention to them," my mom answered.

"Yeah, ever since you guys left, we haven't really focused on them," I said.

It was our little thing to make fun of the Coopers. Every time we got together on Friday evenings, we talked about them. They always did something absurd every week. They were really weird. The husband's name was Fred and his wife's name was Regina. They had a million dogs in their house and we would always hear them barking at night which annoyed all of us. When they walked their dogs, they had a million leashes. It's like watching the updated version of 101 Dalmatians. It was crazy. They wore the craziest clothes ever. Regina wore these electric blue pants with a puffed up bright red shirt. Her hair was always in a fluffed up ponytail. It's like she never got the memo we were living in the 2000s, not the late 1960s or 70s.

When James and I walked home together after school, we would laugh quietly to ourselves, making sure she didn't hear us, but when we got home, we busted out into laughter.

They always played their music really loud and at night and they always had their lights on.

"They really were strange," my dad said with a soft laugh.

"I bet you they still are," James said and I laughed.

"Probably," I said

That's when I noticed it. James leg was pressed against mine and he didn't even move. There was the feeling I got again, the butterflies in my stomach. Maybe I did feel something for James. But I didn't want to.

"So how's college?" James' dad asked snapping me out of my thoughts.

"It's great. Sometimes the work is really hard, but it's awesome," I said and he nodded.

"Any boyfriends?" James' mom asked.

I smiled. "Yeah, I have one. His name is Daniel," I told them and she smiled with joy for me.

"Aw, my little girl is grown up," she said as she hugged me.

I laughed as we all enjoyed talking about everything from what they've done here.

We talked until ten at night before James and I left to go swim.

"I'll meet you down there," he said as he walked into his room.

I walked to mine and found my suitcases by my bed. I grabbed it and laid it on my bed. I got out my neon green bathing suit out.

I was really nervous right now because I was going to be swimming alone with James. I don't know what I was feeling for him. I don't even know what he feels for me. He looks at me differently now. Almost like he respects my space as a woman, something he'd probably never do if he never moved. If he stayed in New York, he'd always be treating me like "one of the guys". He's probably dated a lot of girls here based on the pictures he's sent me. Who knows if he has a girlfriend? I never really asked.

But then again, there is the possibility he liked me. The way he looked at me when he fixed my hair and when we sat next to each other on the couch were things that shouldn't be ignored. It was confusing. I do have my boyfriend back at home and I can't cheat on him. I'm not a slut. I don't go around.

I put on my shirt and shorts over my bikini and grabbed my towel. I walked out of my room and saw him walking out of his. He smiled and for some reason, I liked his smile. It was perfect. I guess it was different than what I remembered it being.

He let me walk in front of him as I made my way down the stairs to the back door.

I opened it and walked outside. I could hear the crickets chirping their melody out in the distance. The temperature had gone down a bit, but it was still hot. Like one of those perfect summer nights with friends just hanging around.

I took off my clothes and laid them on a pool chair. I jumped in; the water was cold as I surfaced above the water. But afterwards the water felt fine. He then jumped in creating a massive wave.

"Whoa," I said and he swam over to me.

"So how are you liking it so far in California?" he asked.

"Well it's only my first day, but so far so good," I said.

We were in the deep end and i was holding onto the edge of the pool so that I wouldn't get tired of paddling.

"Yeah, we're going to go out tomorrow definitely. Unless if your mom and my mom have other plans."

"And what if they do?"

"Well we can just go sight seeing the two of us."

"Like best friends," I said and we smiled.

There was another silent pause where we knew nothing to talk about. I hated this. Every time when we had a conversation, it ended in these pauses. It was getting really annoying.

"Man, what happened?" James asked almost speaking to himself.

"What do you mean?"

"We used to be so close. We used to be best friends. We used to just talk about everything…" he trailed off.

I noticed the struggle he had to finish his sentence.

"And there were never these awkward pauses in our conversations," I finished for him.

"Yeah," he slowly dragged out the word and nodded. "I've been needing to tell you something," James suddenly said.

"What?" I asked quickly.

He looked at me for a long time. It looked like he was debating whether to tell me or not.

"Nothing. Never mind," he said looking at the water.

"Come on James."

"It's nothing. It doesn't even matter."

"Fine," I said.

I wasn't happy with that response. Now I will forever live with the urgency to know what he was going to say.

We swam a little longer before we both got out and went straight to our rooms.

We hugged goodnight and then parted ways to our rooms.

**James Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

It was weird seeing her when she walked out of security in the airport. I wouldn't have recognized her if it weren't for my mom yelling excitedly, "There they are!"

That's when I saw her. It's been eight years and she changed a lot. Her dark brown hair had gotten longer than before and she had become a beautiful girl. I couldn't believe my eyes. It almost seemed like a dream.

When I hugged her, I felt reunited with my best friend and nothing would tear us apart. Ever. But she was only here on vacation. She'd have to leave again. And we'd suffer the same pain all over again.

Eight years ago when I left New York, I left broken hearted. When I left, I liked her. Eight years ago, I fell in love with her. But I didn't do anything because I didn't want to ruin our friendship.

Moving to California helped me forget about her, but seeing her in nearly almost eight years made me fall for her again. Or at least that's what I think is happening. I just hope it's temporary. I don't think she'd want to date me. She only ever treated me like her friend. And I guess that's why I never did anything to become something more minus that one time where I asked her to make out. But technically that doesn't count because I wasn't myself.

When we were swimming tonight, I tried to only look at her as my friend, but she looked beyond pretty in her lime green bikini. My heart was winning the battle with my head. I love her. I always have and I guess I always will. I was going to tell her that I liked her then, but she might've not felt the same way. Besides, she had already said that she has a boyfriend.

When she told me she had a boyfriend earlier, I teased her, but inside, I was dying. My heart broke into ten million pieces. Of course I had girlfriends here and then in California, but I never forgot about Tatiana. She was the one for me.

I like her. But I shouldn't.

I got out of bed unable to sleep and drove around until two in the morning when I was extremely tired. I got in bed and fell asleep immediately.

The next day, I slept in, but then my mom came in and opened the blinds.

"Aren't you going to be late for work?" she asked as she walked over to the side of my bed.

"I don't need to go in today," I said placing the pillow on top of my head trying to get more sleep. I was tired.

"How are things with Tati?" she asked smiling at me.

I lifted the pillow up a bit and peeked at her.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"You like her. It's obvious."

"Mom, she has a boyfriend."

"So you do like her," she teased.

"Mom, she's taken," I repeated.

"Taken or not, I wouldn't let her go. You guys have always had something special," she said and then she left.

Yeah, like ten years ago I wanted to say, but what's the point.

I sat up in bed and ran my fingers through my hair. I rubbed my eyes and when I opened them, Tatiana was standing in front of my bed. She was wearing jean shorts and a blue blouse. Gosh, she looked so beautiful.

"Hey sleepy head."

She sat at the end of my bed by my feet.

"Hey," I said getting out.

"Do you know what time it is?"

"No," I responded still not fully awake.

"It's eleven. I've been awake since eight," she exclaimed.

"That's great," I told her walking to my closet to get out my clothes.

I wanted to tell her that it was because of the time difference that she was awake early, but I didn't.

"James," she said and I turned to face her. "You said you'd take me sight seeing."

"Yeah just let me get changed and we can go."

I changed into a white shirt and put on my khaki shorts. I brushed my teeth and combed my hair.

When I was done, I walked out of the bathroom and she was looking at the pictures hanging on my wall.

"What year was this?" she asked looking at a picture of me and some of my friends.

"This was my junior year of high school."

She looked around to other pictures. I watched her move around and I was falling more in love with her. This isn't possible. Why am I falling in love with her? The more time I spend with her, the more I love her.

But I shouldn't crush on Tati; she's my best friend. Things would be awkward if we dated. Hell. Things are awkward as it is right now. So why is it that I'm falling in love all over again? She'd never feel the same way.

"So when did you actually become famous?" she asked.

"Well I auditioned for a show and it took like six years. They chose me and some other guys to do Big Time Rush, and now I'm just living life as it comes."

She nodded as she took her time analyzing every picture carefully. I stood next to her and saw the way her eyes bounced off every picture. I was falling for her and I couldn't stop myself from doing it all over again.

"Come on," I said. "Lets go explore CA."

**Tatiana's Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

The pictures I was looking at where really interesting, but it made me upset that I wasn't there to make those memories with him. I stumbled onto some pictures with him and some girls I had no idea who they were and got a bit jealous inside. I used to be his best friend. I used to be the only who did all the fun stuff with him, but not anymore. Long story short, I felt replaced in James' life.

We got in his car and he drove to LA.

I liked California. The sun was always out and the temperature was nice. It wasn't too hot, neither too cold. I sat in the passenger seat looking out the window.

"I'm meeting up with some of my friends at McDonalds," he said.

"Cool. So I'm meeting your friends?" I asked.

He nodded and smiled. "Yeah, it's 'cause I'm soon going to be touring again and we have to talk about it and all."

"Really? Oh my gosh. How is it like to go on tour?" I asked happily.

"It's amazing. You meet new people and make new friends. And I love it," he said keeping his eyes on the road.

I looked at him and he was smiling. I always loved to see him happy. I was trying hard to be his best friend. To make things like they were before, but of course, things have changed. He's changed. He's gotten better looking and I'm amazed with his new features. I don't think we see each other the same way we used to.

I always loved his eyes. I remember one time when we were sitting on the roof when I was eleven and he twelve.

"Why do you keep starring at me?" he would ask.

"I love your eyes," I told him and he smiled.

"They're hazel."

"I know. I'm obsessed with them right now."

We both laughed and watched the sunset together. I didn't really see it because I was so focused on his beautiful eyes. But that's how I told him I loved his eyes.

I laid my head back against the chair. James is really sweet and I think I might feel something for him. Hopefully I don't fall for him. I have a boyfriend in New York who is equally like James. They're fun, understanding, and cute; I can't see myself dating James. Either way, he probably has girls who like him.

I closed my eyes and took a small nap.

I felt the car stop, but I didn't want to wake up.

"Tats," he called as he turned the car off. "Tator tots."

I could tell he was smiling. I laughed a little.

"Yeah?" I said opening my eyes.

"We're here."

He got out of the car and I followed. He waited for me so we could walk in together.

"Do you want anything in particular here?" he asked.

"Sure," I told him.

"They're not here yet," he mentioned.

I nodded and we both got in line. "You know what I want."

He smiled. "Of course I do. How can I forget? It's my favorite."

He walked up to the cash register. He ordered our favorite food, which was the ten-piece chicken nuggets meal. We use to only get one and share it equally, but as we grew older, we always ended up complaining to each other that one of us ate more fries than the other. So our parents bought us each separate ones.

When he got the food, he handed me a cup. I went to go fill it in with sprite and he had coke. We sat down at a table and started to eat our food.

"Do you ever think how life would've been like if you didn't move to California?" I asked.

"Yeah, I sometimes try to imagine it. You know I had a lot of trouble leaving New York. Especially leaving you as my best friend," he said stuffing his mouth with French fries.

"The good old times," I said and he nodded.

"How are your brother and sister?" I asked.

"They're good, doing their things. They come visit me every now and then," he said. "Remember when they would tease us and say that we liked each other?" James suddenly asked.

He was laughing like it was funny. I laughed as well.

"Yeah!" I claimed. "That was funny," I added.

The laughter died down and then it got awkward again. I sighed and took out my phone. I got a text from Daniel.

_Hey, how's Cali? Have you bought me anything yet? ;)_

I responded: _It's great and no not yet. It's only my second day! But don't worry. I'm going sight seeing later today and I'll get you something_.

"Who are you texting?" James asked.

"Daniel," I responded putting my phone away.

He nodded eating his nugget.

"How'd you guys meet?" he asked.

"At a party. We started talking and we instantly connected."

"Are you guys like serious?"

"What do you mean?" I asked confused.

"I mean, are you guys like in love," he said.

It was pretty weird for him to be asking these questions. I was about to answer him when a couple of guys came up to the table. I was confused who they were and wondered why they were here in the first place, but I looked to James and saw that he knew these guys. These must be his band mates he was talking about.

"Oh, so this is the girl that has you-" one of the guys with blonde hair started to say, but James cut him off.

"Her name is Tatiana, and she's my best friend. Well we grew up together in New York," he explained to them.

Then James turned to me.

"Tati, this is Kendall," he said introducing me to the guy whom James cut off. "This is Carlos," he continued pointing to the shorter one with black hair. "And this is Logan," he said introducing me to the guy with brown grass hair.

"Nice to meet you guys," I said and they smiled.

"So what's the plan for today?" Carlos asked.

"Well I promised Tats that I would take her sightseeing," James said.

"You didn't call us to talk about the tour right?" Kendall asked smiling at him and he shook his head.

"Alright," Logan said. "Lets do this."

We got up from the table and I got inside James' car.

"Alright. Were shall we go first?" James asked.

"Where ever you want to take me," I answered.

"Lets go to Hollywood."


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4**

He put the car on drive and his friends followed behind.

"I think we're going to stop at the sign."

"Okay."

When we got there, I saw the Hollywood sign up in the grassy hills. The one I've seen many times in pictures, but never in person.

"Wow. It looks better than in pictures," I said taking a picture with my phone.

"Obviously," James said and everyone laughed.

I stuck my tongue out at James and he only laughed more. I rolled my eyes playfully and took more pictures. I even got one with all the guys when we asked a random person to take our picture.

"We should take you to downtown LA," Carlos said.

I looked to James.

"Yeah James, take me to LA." I said looking towards him.

"Can I hear a please?" James asked.

"Please?"

He smiled and nodded.

We walked back to the car. The guys got in their car and I got in James'. He started the car and drove to LA.

"When we're in LA, I doubt we're going to go to any other place," James said breaking up the silence.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because LA is LA. There's lots to do and time will fly by quickly, trust me."

"Hold on," I said.

My phone was vibrating. I was getting a call from Daniel.

"Hey Dan," I said.

"Hey how are you?" he asked through the phone.

"I'm good. I'm finally touring Cali," I said and he laughed.

"That's great! Are you having fun?" he asked.

"Definitely," I answered. "I got you something," he mentioned. I was interested in what it was.

"What did you get me?" I asked curiously.

"You'll have to wait and see," he teased.

"Daniel," I whined.

"Sorry Tats."

"Fine. When I get you something I'm not going to tell you what it is."

"Okay, then we'll be even," he said and I knew he was smiling at the other end. "So where are you right now?" he asked.

"Well we're going to LA right now," I told him.

"Who's we?" he asked curiously.

"James. You know, the guy I always talked about?" I said making sure I didn't sound like I was with some random guy and was cheating on him.

"Oh yeah!" -He seemed to remember- "Aw, you're with your best friend."

"Yeah, after like eight years."

"That's a long time. I'm glad you're having fun. Hey, I got to go. I'll talk to you later, love you," he said.

"Alright bye."

I hung up.

"You were saying?" I asked.

"Yeah basically LA has a lot of fun things to do and time will fly by quickly."

"Cool. I guess we'll continue sight seeing tomorrow then," I said.

He laughed softly and we continued driving to LA.

**James Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

Every time I see her, I just fall in love with her. She takes my breath away. The way her hair sways from left to right when she walks. Her cute laugh that never changed ever since we were little. Her warm smile that brought joy to my day.

But I hate it how she has a boyfriend when I knew her longer. Liked her longer. Loved her longer. I'm the only one who knows her personally. But now there's this new guy named Daniel? Who the hell was he? Every time she mentioned him, I got furious inside. I don't like this guy. She's never told me about him. Of course I don't blame her. We kind of grew apart ever since I moved to California. But it aggravates me. It pisses me off.

It was one of those normal Fridays where we went to each other's houses. She was eleven and I was twelve. We went to go watch a movie just the two of us and we sat next to each other. I told her I'd pay for everything.

"But James," she would complain.

I only shushed her up. We shared the popcorn and soda. I realized I was feeling nervous for some reason around her. Of course I always felt like this, but it wasn't as bad as this.

My palms were getting sweaty and I was scared she might notice something. My back was burning up and my hands were becoming shaky. Good thing I didn't drop the popcorn or the soda on our way to our seats.

In the theatre, sitting next to each other, I placed the soda in the cup holder and I held the popcorn. At occasional times, we would reach in at the same time and our hands would touch. I felt a strange rush run through my body making me even shakier than before.

She would say sorry and take her hand back out waiting her turn. She even laughed her cute laugh I always thought was adorable.

Then when we walked around Town Square at night, the Christmas lights glistened against her face and she looked like an angel. A beautiful girl whom I was with. That was the day I knew I liked her. Of course I liked her before, but that was the very day that I knew she was the one for me. It was only a matter of time when I found out that I was leaving a year later.

I parked the car and got out to meet up with the guys. She followed behind us.

"What should I get Daniel?" she said walking in between Carlos and Logan.

"Is he your boyfriend?" Logan asked.

"Yeah," Tati said.

"You should get him like a sweatshirt," Carlos suggested.

"What would be nice," she said.

We continued walking on the busy sidewalk of LA. I stayed behind them walking with Kendall just thinking about how beautiful Tati is. But I could never tell her I liked her. She has her boyfriend back in New York. It's things like this that bother me. If I had stayed, I'm pretty sure one year later I would have told her I liked her. But I like my life right now and I'm proud with what I am doing.

"James," -Logan called, snapping me out of my thoughts- "I think everyone is getting together and hosting a party at your house if that's alright," he said.

"A party for what?" I asked forgetting that my birthday was in three days.

"For your twenty second birthday," he said.

"Oh yeah, is everyone invited?" I asked and he nodded.

This party already seemed like it was going to be a blast.

"Wait you're having a party?" Tatiana asked.

"Yeah, you guys are invited," I told her.

"Well then I need to get something for you," she said smiling at me.

She was now walking next to me and our arms were nearly touching.

"You don't have to. The best gift you gave was coming here."

"No. But I want to," she said as she looked into my eyes.

I looked at her and smiled. We were quiet for a few, but then I looked away and kept walking.

"Alright," I gave up and we walked into the first store.

"James. You're not leaving my side." She grabbed my hand and pulled me with her. She was still the same Tatiana I always knew, but some things did change.

**Tatiana's Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

I was shopping for Daniel's sweatshirt. I wanted James' opinion on the stuff I picked out because he was my friend. The only one whom I knew longer that was currently with me. I wanted to get Daniel something good, something that would surprise him.

"Do you think he'll like this?" I asked him, but he seemed the least interested.

"Yeah," he said.

"Are you sure?"

"I'm a guy. Trust me he'll like it."

I purchased the grey sweater with Los Angeles in black letters on the front.

"Come on, let's do something else other than walking around in LA." James said.

"What do you want to do?" I asked.

"I have an idea."

I wanted to know his idea, but I didn't ask him. He held my hand taking me back to the car.

"Where are we going?" I thought LA is LA," I said laughing.

He started laughing. "It is, but you can come when ever you need to. Just get in the car," he said unlocking the car doors.

We got in his car and turned the radio on. I blasted the music and we both laughed and sang. Of course he had a better voice than me- he always had. But I loved listening to him sing. He sounded like a sweet angel.

"What about your friends?" I yelled over the music.

"I texted them. They're cool about it," he yelled back.

We sung songs for what seemed like hours. Ultimately, he rolled the windows up and put the AC on. After a while of just driving, I shivered, but I didn't want him to turn the AC off.

"Here," he said reaching in the back seat and handing me his sweater.

"Thanks."

I placed it on top of me like a blanket, which had a faint smell of his cologne. I took a small nap and when I woke up the sun was setting.

"I stopped to get some McDonalds," he said.

"Oh awesome. Thanks," I told him.

I had no idea where we were.

"Where exactly are you taking me?" I asked eating the French fries.

"Somewhere," he said smiling.

"James, come on. Tell me," I pleaded and he only shook his head.

"Did you have a nice nap?" he asked.

"Way to change the subject, but my nap was good," I told him.

"We're almost there," he said as he continued driving.

I looked at the signs, but I still had no idea where we were. I decided to take another nap instead and when I woke up, the car had stopped on a cliff. I looked around. The sun was barely over the horizon and the sky was getting dark. It appeared to be that we were on some sort of a mountain. I looked out the window and saw the city down below. It looked beautiful.

"What city is it?" I asked.

"San Francisco," he said opening the door and getting out.

There were few people around, but they were beginning to leave.

"This is beautiful," I got out of the car and joined him by his side. "So this was where you were taking me," I said and he nodded his head.

"We're going to look at the stars tonight."

My eyes widened with delight and I smiled remembering that it was one of the things we've always wanted to do ever since we were small.

"So we're going to wait until the stars come out?" I asked excitedly.

"Yeah."

He walked over to a grassy area and sat down. I sat next to him as we looked far out into the city.

"Do you see the bridge?" he pointed to a figure way out.

"Mhm. It looks really nice," I said.

We were far out from the city. Almost in the countryside of California, but barely out of the city. It was like the suburbs. When I saw the first star I pointed up at it and smiled.

"Look!" I said.

James looked up to find the first star of the night. I laid down so I wouldn't hurt my neck by tilting it up for too long. He then did the same, but turned his body and laid his head on my stomach.

"Is it fine?" he asked.

"Yeah."

I started to play with his hair for some reason. It was like his hair was a magnet that attracted my hand to it. It felt soft and luscious as I ran my fingers through it. He didn't do anything to avoid the touch so I kept my hand there.

The night got darker and the moon came out. It illuminated the ground and I could see James perfect face clearly.

He was now lying right next to me. We were having a sweet best friend moment. I turned my head to face him.

"Thanks," I told him and he turned to face me too.

I saw a gleam in his eyes, which looked pretty. I was falling for James and I couldn't help myself. I know I shouldn't. I have a boyfriend.

"I just remembered this was the one thing we always wanted to do when we were younger."

We had many more things we wanted to do, but this was number one on our list. It was because the thought of simply lying in the grass at night was peaceful and relaxing. We both enjoyed those things growing up together.

I heard the crickets chirping away in the dark while the calm breeze blew softly across my face. The grass beneath me was smooth and cold and the night was quiet and tranquil; just the two of us lying on the smooth grass together.

We smiled at each other for a long time.

Suddenly he gave me a new look. Well I had seen it before from him the time he was fixing my hair, but I didn't want to be wrong. He looked like he wanted to kiss me. And I kind of did too. Just have two people kissing under the stars, why not?

Suddenly our faces were moving in, getting closer and closer, until our lips were centimeters away from each other, but I couldn't kiss him. I remembered I had a boyfriend. I tilted my head back and pulled myself away from him to watch the stars leaving James hanging on to something that could never happen.

I swallowed. What was I doing? I couldn't kiss James. I have a boyfriend. But James is really cute. Yet so is Daniel. And I can't cheat on him. I'm not those type of girls.

"So you're going into your third year of college?" James asked looking back at the stars.

Good thing he said something, because I wasn't sure what I should've said to him.

"Yup. But I have nine more years to go, ten including this one," I told him trying to make what almost happened five seconds ago normal.

"Ten?" he asked surprised.

"I'm studying to be a pediatrician."

"Oh," he said. "Makes sense. So you're going to be working with little kids?"

"Yeah. It seems like a lot of fun though. I mean you're already living your dream," I said and I saw him turn to look at me.

"Yeah. I love it. It's what I've wanted to do my entire life. And I'm blessed to have this job. It's amazing."

We smiled to each other and I laid my head on his arm.

"Here," he said.

He moved his arm out so I could position my head better. I was close to his body and felt so much comfortable. I could almost fall asleep. He secured a grip around me and I felt safe in his arms, like nothing bad could ever happen.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"I think like ten thirty."

"We've seriously been out here for that long?" I asked shocked.

"Yup."

"It looks really pretty. Especially the view."

"Yeah, you tend to love California a little more," he said.

"To be honest, I'm kind of loving Cali more than NY," I admitted and he laughed.

We were facing each other. He looked at me with his hazel eyes and even though it was dark, I could see his gorgeous eyes and smile.

"We should get home," he said getting up.

"Alright."

We got in the car and headed back home. I ended up falling asleep in the passenger seat.

When we entered the house it was around four in the morning.

I wasn't fully awake when James called my name. It sounded so distant, I thought I was dreaming.

I felt James turn the car off and suddenly he was carrying me up the stairs. Soon enough I was lying in my bed. He took off my shoes and put me under the blankets. I wasn't sure if my senses were fully awake, but I'm almost certain I felt James gently tuck my hair behind my ear and kiss me on the cheek.

I fell right asleep after.


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5**

The next day, I woke up in the clothes I wore yesterday; jean shorts and my white fancy tang top.

I sat up in bed and checked my phone. It was one in the afternoon. I checked my messages and had no texts or calls from Daniel. It was weird. Usually he'd leave multiple texts or something, but this time, nothing.

I dialed Daniel's number and he didn't pick up. I tried again, but he wouldn't pick up. This was strange. He always picked up. I left him a voicemail and sat in bed confused.

Just then James walked by.

"James!" I called out.

"Morning," he said stopping in the doorway to my room. "Have a good sleep?"

"Yeah. I just wanted to thank you for last night."

"Anytime. Do you want breakfast?" he asked. "Or brunch?" he reconsidered since it was past breakfast time.

I smiled. "Yes please," I said getting out of bed.

We walked downstairs to the kitchen to get something to eat.

"How long have you been up?" I asked

"Like an hour ago."

"Where's everyone?"

"They went out, shopping I suppose."

He handed me a plate with pancakes piled on top of each other. They looked yummy. James' mom must've remembered my favorite pancakes: chocolate chip pancakes.

He handed me the maple syrup and the butter along with another plate.

"Have as much as you want," he said.

"Thanks."

I began to eat my pancake after applying the butter and syrup. They tasted so good.

"So what are we doing today?" I asked.

"Do you want to go to the beach today? They guys invited us," he said checking out something on his phone.

"Sounds like fun."

I finished eating my pancake and walked back upstairs to change. I put on a red flow-y strapless dress suitable for the beach.

I walked in the bathroom to comb my hair and brush my teeth. When I was done, I grabbed my phone and checked it one last time seeing nothing new. I put it in my bag along with my wallet and sun tan lotion.

I walked out of my room and down the stairs to the living room where James was sitting.

"Ready?" he asked.

"Yes."

We walked out of the house and got in his car.

"I'm excited for your birthday," I said.

He smiled looking at me before reversing his car and driving out of the driveway.

"I'm pretty excited too."

"I hear the party is going to be amazing."

"Well I wouldn't know about that. All I know is that there's a party at my house. I have no idea who is invited. The guys and my parents are taking care of that."

I laughed. "Are you serious?"

He nodded.

"So it's somewhat a surprise only you know you're having it?" I asked.

"Pretty much. It would've been a surprise, but I figured it out," he said.

I laughed.

I saw the other cars passing by. Soon we were on the highway.

"Hey, what time did we get home last night?"

"Like four in the freaking morning!" he exclaimed.

"Wow, San Francisco is really far from LA."

"Yeah."

"Was I heavy when you carried me to my room?"

"You? Heavy? Are you seriously asking? You're like a feather," he said laughing.

"Thanks, I guess," I said.

I wanted to bring up what he did. The last thing he did before I completely fell asleep, so I did.

"What about that kiss?" I asked.

"What kiss?" he asked confused.

"The one from last night," I reminded him.

He still gave me the confused, oblivious look.

"You kissed my cheek."

"You felt that?"

I nodded.

"Well I was just giving you a goodnight kiss," he said defending him self.

"Was it really just that?" I teased.

"Yes Tati. I wouldn't kiss you because I liked you."

"What about last night in San Francisco?" I questioned.

"What about it? When you almost kissed me and cheated on your boyfriend," he teased back.

He was smiling as he looked at the road ahead of him. He glanced over at me to find a very offended face.

"I was not! You… You were going to kiss me. You gave me the look and all," I began finding it hard to explain.

"What look? I gave no look at all," he laughed.

"James. You looked at me like you wanted to kiss me," I stated.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he said talking as if I was crazy.

I don't blame him. Guys don't usually pick up on things like girls do so I don't entirely blame him for his stupidity.

"Okay this was the look," I said copying the same face he did last night.

"You mean this look?" he asked making the same one.

"Yes!" I yelled.

"That look doesn't mean I want to kiss you, but I guess someone did want to kiss," he said looking to me.

I glared at him and he only busted out in laughter.

"I did not want to kiss you," I stated firmly.

"Then why were you moving closer?"

"Why were you?" I asked turning the question around to him.

"I asked you first," he said.

"Too bad," I said laughing.

"Well I'm not answering it," he said.

"I'll answer it for you. It was because_ you_ wanted to kiss me," I said putting emphasis on 'you'.

"No you wanted to kiss me," he argued back.

"You know? Whatever. You wanted to kiss me and that's that," I said holding my head up high and looking straight out of the windowsdhield.

"Tati wanted to kiss me last night," he mumbled softly but soft enough so that I could hear him.

"I hate you," I joked.

He laughed and we kept driving.

As far as our friendship, it was getting there. The awkwardness was slowly disappearing and even though it was quite in his car right now, it wasn't really awkward.

"What beach are we going to?"

"Malibu," he answered.

"Are we almost there?"

"Yeah in like twenty minutes."

We continued to drive. Soon enough I could smell the ocean. I rolled my windows down and took it all in. The salty wind was blowing in my face and the sun's rays were beaming down. I closed my eyes and smiled. It just had a welcoming feeling. I loved the beach.

When we got to Malibu Beach, he parked his car and we got out.

"Can I put my phone inside your bag?"

"Yeah."

I took his phone and placed it in a pocket holder within my bag.

"Thanks."

"Your welcome."

We walked on the boardwalk until a certain destination before James turned to actually walk on the beach. We walked down the stairs and headed over to the guys, which I spotted once we got closer.

"Hey," James said greeting them with their manly ways.

"Hey," they said facing me.

"Guys. Guess what?" James asked.

"What?" they asked.

"Tati was about to kiss me last night."

He looked at me smiling. I stared at him and rolled my eyes playfully.

"_Oooooh_," the guys said in perfect unison.

"No guys, that was James who wanted to kiss me. That's why he couldn't stop himself and I could," I stated facing James.

"_Oooooh,_" they said again laughing.

"James, she got you," Kendall said.

"Tati, you couldn't stop yourself until our lips were practically touching," James said.

"They were not!" I argued.

"And that's why you gave me 'the look'," he said air quoting the words.

"What look? I gave you no look."

"The look were you were like, _oh why didn't I kiss him. I should've_ kind of look."

"Damn, he got you back," Logan said in the back.

I ignored Logan's statement.

"James, no. You wanted to kiss me and that's why you kissed me last night when you left me in my room."

"Oh you were in her room James?" Carlos asked teasingly.

"Not like that Carlos," he said laughing before turning to me again. "I pointed this out that it was a goodnight kiss. And if I wanted to kiss you, I would've kissed your lips, not your cheek," he pointed out.

I rolled my eyes.

"You're really annoying," I said to James.

"Guys come on, lets just get in the water," Kendall said removing his shirt.

They all followed after and I took my dress off. I was wearing my hot pink bikini from Hollister.

The guys were already in the water swimming away. I walked up to the clear blue water holding my phone. Malibu beach was an amazing beach. The people were so alive and the waves were pretty.

I snapped some pictures when I got a call from Megan.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey. What's up?"

"At the beach."

"Oh then I shouldn't tell you,"

"Tell me what?" I asked curiously.

"Nothing," she said a bit too quickly.

"Megan tell me right now. I'm sure it's not that bad."

"It is."

There was a pause before she said, "Daniel cheated on you."

"What?" I asked.

Suddenly everything blurred out. It felt like I was the only one standing on the beach. I didn't want to believe what she had just said because I know Daniel would never hurt me like this.

"He cheated on you Tati whether you want to accept it or not."

"He couldn't have. He loves me and would never ever, not even in a million years, cheat on me," I said.

"Well he did. He got wasted last night and hooked up with Mary."

Mary Deet. She was the girl I did not like. She was a total slut. I hated her. Everyday she slept in some guy's dorm. She always acted like she was better than everyone else. I'm surprised Penn State actually accepted dumb bitches like her. Her whole posies are bitches and whores. They literally go to parties or clubs to get drunk and hook up with some random guy. I wouldn't be surprised if she ended up in a stripper club working for her life savings.

And to know that Mary hooked up with my boyfriend last night pissed me off. Daniel even knew I hated her and still, he went out and had sex with her. I wanted to jump on a plane and fly back to New York just to strangle that bitch, by bitch I meant Mary.

"How do you know?"

"Literally everyone is talking about it. They even have mentioned you," she said.

"You're kidding me, right?"

"No, I'm not. It's just the truth."

"It still doesn't make sense! He wouldn't do it though. I know him well enough to know he wouldn't cheat on me."

"Clearly you don't. Has he called or texted you at all today?" Megan asked.

"No," I said realizing it was true.

He did cheat on me.

"Then there's your answer," she said.

"Thanks for letting me know," I said pacing back and forth on the phone.

"Anytime. Have fun. Bye," she said.

I hung up and held the phone close to my chest. I looked down to sand and took in all of what she said.

It couldn't be true. He would never, but it would explain the lack of texts and calls from him today and yesterday. I walked back to my bag and threw my phone in my bag. I sat in the sand, thinking about the subject more.

I couldn't reach Daniel. I already tried calling him earlier today and he wouldn't pick up. He just wouldn't.

I could feel the tears welling up behind my eyes. I wanted to run far away to a place without anyone to bother me. I wanted to be alone; to just think about what I should do next, but nothing would come to mind.

I really loved Daniel and breaking up with him would be hard. I didn't want to. What we had is special.

I didn't want to cry. Not now. Everyone would see and they would just want to know what happened. And when they do know what happened, they would just feel sorry for you because what else are they were supposed to feel? I'd rather have them save their sympathy for something else rather than my situation.

I buried my face in my hands and wiped some tears that managed to slip from my eyes. I breathed in and out slowly, trying to calm myself. I looked up and blinked to ensure no other tears would fall.

"Hey," James said walking up to me.

"Oh hey," I managed to say normally with out my voice being shaky.

"You okay?" he asked looking into my eyes, examining them.

"Yeah," I said standing up. "I just need some space right now," I told him.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

Before I could further walk away I felt him grab my wrist and turn me around to face him. I could feel the lump grow in my throat and my eyes water even more. I knew I couldn't talk anymore. If I did, I would just burst out into tears.

I looked anywhere but at James.

"Can you stop being stubborn and just tell me what's wrong?"

I shook my head.

"Tati," he said placing his hand on my cheek and slowly turning it so that I could look at him. "Tell me."

I took a deep breath in and tried swallowing.

"Daniel cheated on me," my voice was low.

A few set of tears streamed down my face and I wiped them away.

"I'm sorry," he said.

That's the exact sympathy I didn't want from people. That's all anyone would say. They should be sorry for something else. I don't want them to be sorry for me.

"I just don't know what to do now," I said as tears fell again against my face.

"I'd break up if I were you. And I know it's easier said than done, but I've been in that situation before," he said.

I looked at him.

"But it's not easy when you're in love."

"I know, but you have to be strong," he said.

Strong was the last thing I was right now.

"He hasn't even called or anything." I wiped my tears away.

"Because he doesn't know what to say to you. I mean he just cheated on you. He's nervous as to what you're going to do or say," James said.

"When I see him, I'm going to kill him," I said feeling more tears escape.

I was on the verge of a meltdown. I just wanted to explode into tears and eat my pain away with ice cream or chocolate. I didn't want to be at the beach anymore as lovely as it was.

"No you're not," James said pulling me in for a hug.

As soon as he did, all the tears I was holding before just fell out and I cried against his chest. He rubbed my bare back as I cried. His soft skin after being dry was wet again from all my tears.

We must've been there for at least ten minutes.

"Do you want to go home?" he asked.

I nodded, but I didn't want to let go of him. This same position reminded me of the time he moved to California when we were younger.

He took my bag and I walked to the car. He waved bye to his friends.

"You'll make it through," James said.

We got in the car and I continued to cry.

James and I didn't say anything. I still kept crying quietly though.

My breathing got uncontrollable at one point and James even stopped the car to check on me.

He placed his hand on my back.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Just drive," I said trying to calm myself.

He gave me a worried look and I felt bad for him that he had to deal with me when he should be with his friends swimming.

We reached the house and got out of the car. He came over and helped me up the stairs to my room.

"They're still not here," he said.

My parents were still out and about. Good. I didn't want them to know about me.

I got under my covers and buried my face in my pillow. I cried harder then I ever did. I wanted to throw everything and make them break like the way I did, but what's the point? It wouldn't prove anything.

"Here's the ice cream and chocolate."

James appeared in my room again holding a container of rainbow sherbet and a box of Ferrero Rocher chocolate. He settled them on top of my bed and left my room.

I slowly sat up in my bed and reached over to start eating. My breathing still wasn't normal. It sounded like I was gasping for air.

I began to eat peacefully, the tears still falling. I needed to pull myself together.

I turned the TV on in my room and watched the only movie that was showing,_ A Walk to Remember_.

I continued to eat and soon enough the tears stopped falling. I was just feeling gloomy and down now.

My phone was ringing in my bag. I got up slowly and walked over to it. I took it out and didn't even bother checking who was calling. Who ever it was, I would just blow them off. I didn't care right now.

"Hello," I said.

"Hey."

It was Daniel.


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6**

I was too upset to talk to anyone. Especially him. The nerve he has to call after cheating on me with some whore.

"What do you want?" I said coldly.

He didn't seem to notice, like all guys. They're oblivious to everything.

"I'm in California!" he said excitedly.

I wanted to punch my fist in a wall to let out all the anger I was having. Why the hell was he in California? It annoyed me so much.

"Where?" I asked.

Suddenly I got all this energy from nowhere to go find Daniel and set him straight. James' words rushed back to my head: "Break up." Something I was willing to do.

"In LA at a Starbucks. I'm pretty sure it's the only one, so you'll find me easily," he said.

"I'll be right there," I said hanging up.

I didn't wait to say bye and hear his fake 'I love you'.

I grabbed my purse and walked downstairs to the kitchen.

James dad and my dad were together watching an old football game sitting on the couch like they always did back in New York. My mom was in the kitchen with James' mom cooking dinner.

"Hey!" they both said at the same time.

"Hey. Do you know where James is?" I asked.

"I don't know," my mom said.

"He went out like an hour ago," James' mom answered for me.

Crap. My only source of transportation was gone.

"Why?" they asked.

"I needed to go somewhere. But I'll just call a taxi," I said getting out my phone.

"No, just borrow my car," James' mom said handing me her keys.

"Thank you so much!"

I gave her a quick hug and rushed out of the house. I got in the car and drove to downtown LA.

I thought long and hard about breaking up with him. And I was going to do it. I'm not going to stick around and be Daniel's bitch. I'm not letting him think that with one mistake he does, everything is forgiven. Maybe with his past girlfriends it was like that, but not with me.

I got out of my car once I arrived and began walking down the sidewalk to Starbucks. On my way there, I happened to make eye contact with a familiar looking guy that passed by. I ignored the want to turn around and see whom it was. The guy must've just reminded me of someone from New York.

Suddenly someone called out my name.

"Tati?"

I turned around to find a tall guy standing before me.

"Kendall?"

"Hey! What happened? You guys left early?" he asked.

"Yeah, um, I don't know…" I trailed off unsure what to say.

I didn't want to tell him exactly what it was because I didn't really know him well enough.

He laughed softly.

"Can you give this to James whenever you see him?" he asked handing me an envelope.

"Sure." I said.

"Thanks."

"Your welcome."

He disappeared into the large crowd of people and I continued on my mission to Starbucks.

I saw the coffee shop down the street and headed over there. I walked in to the coffee scented shop and found Daniel in a corner next to the window sipping his cup of coffee. He has a laid-back attitude right now. I can tell because he is leaned against the chair and slouched his shoulders. It made me sick.

I made my way over to him and stood before him.

"Tati!" he said standing up.

He walked over and kissed me on the lips. I barely kissed him back. He doesn't deserve my kisses.

We both sat down.

"So what brings you to California?" I asked.

"We needed to talk," he said.

"About how you cheated on me?"

"What?" he asked confused.

"Don't try to act like you don't know," I rolled my eyes.

"I didn't," he said sounding defensive.

"Now you're lying to me."

"I'm not."

"Then why are you here? Is it to tell me how you cheated on me? Or are you just here to tell me the lies I believed when you said you loved me and missed me. Whole time you were whoring around with bitches. Are you seriously stupid Daniel? Are you that stupid?"

"No I'm not."

"Then why'd you get drunk and have freaking sex with freaking Mary Deet? Answer my question again. Are you stupid?" I yelled in his face.

I was pretty sure people were staring at me, but I didn't care.

"Tati, I'm not. I didn't cheat on you with that skank," he said.

"Stop lying. Cheating was enough damage, I clearly don't need anymore," I said.

"But I didn't," he yelled.

"Daniel. Why do you deny it? Just tell me the fucking truth," I demanded under my breath.

"Okay. Okay," he said placing his hans on the table. "I got wasted and did hook up with Mary," he mumbled softly.

I looked out of the window.

Somehow hearing the truth from the actual person who hurt you hurts ten times more than hearing it from a friend. Hearing this from him killed me inside and made me want to punch him in the face so hard to make him feel the pain I was feeling.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"I don't know," I murmured standing up.

He stood up and walked to stand in front of me.

"Can we talk about this?"

"I don't have time for your bullshit. We're done Daniel. You screwed everything up," I said pounding him hard on his chest. "And I can't be with a guy like you anymore," I added.

Somehow the tears were coming back. I was tired of crying, but the tears where always right there.

"Can I explain myself at least?" he asked.

"Explain what? There's nothing to explain because you simply don't know what to say. All there is to the story is that you were drunk and you cheated on your girlfriend," I said.

"Tati. I don't want it to be over," he said.

"I didn't want it to end either. But you screwed everything up," my voice cracked.

He held my hands in his.

"What can I do?"

"Nothing. It's over," I said taking my hands out of his grasp.

I walked away from him towards the door to leave back home.

When suddenly I felt a pair of eyes staring at my every move. I casually looked around, glancing around everywhere until I spotted him.

James.

He was in Starbucks.

I wonder if he had seen what was going on. How long had he been watching me?

I made eye contact with him, but he quickly looked away. He was sitting at a table, but wasn't alone. In front of him was another cup of coffee.

I began to walk over there to hand him the envelope Kendall gave me, but then another girl with light brown hair joined him.

I slowly backed away feeling a bit hurt.

This was all too much for me. Everything was just falling apart. I don't even understand why I felt jealous seeing James with another girl. I shouldn't, we were just friends and we each have our own problems.

I just broke up with Daniel, who was 3/4th of the reason why I was hurt, but the 1/4th was seeing James with another girl. I thought I was the only girl in James' life.

I made my way to the door instead and pushed it open revealing the orange sky and warm summer breeze. I walk outside and just walked.

"I'm not giving up!" I heard Daniel from behind.

I turned around to see him standing at the door.

"We're done. It's over. I really need to go," I said turning away from him and walking with the flow of the crowd.

"I wont stop trying until I have you again," he called out and that was the last thing I heard from him.

I walked anywhere not knowing where to go. Before I realized it I was crying again and I couldn't continue anymore. People were bumping into me and pushing me around. I felt weak.

I sat on the curb of the sidewalk crying and wiping the tears away from my face. People were probably thinking, who is this girl? What is she doing?

But I was too hurt internally to even care.

"Tati? Is that you?" A voice that sounded similar to James' came from behind me.

I wiped my tears away and took a deep breath. I turned around and found Kendall. Again.

"Hey."

"Are you okay? What happened?" His face look concerned as he stared at me. He placed his hands on my arms helping me up.

"Everything." I answered.

"Do you want to get some ice cream or something?" he asked.

Right now, my only best friend was ice cream. It can easily take my problems away so I nodded and he helped me up.

We walked to an ice cream shop right down the street and ordered chocolate ice cream for the both of us. I took mine and started eating like I needed it, which I did.

"Thanks," I said.

"So what really happened?" he asked working his mouth around the ice cream to make sure none of it dripped.

"I broke up with Daniel," I said.

"Really? Why? I thought you guys were perfect for each other?"

"He cheated on me. My friend told me. I'm just so pissed and angry at the world."

"If it makes you feel any better, I was once cheated on before by a model I dated."

We laughed softly with each other.

"I'm just mad that he had to do it with a freaking whore I hate," I said.

"Hey. You're probably better than her and it's Daniel's loss," he said.

I smiled. "Thanks. I did the right thing though; to break up with him?" I asked.

He nodded. "Trust me. I would've done the same."

I didn't want to continue talking about Daniel anymore so I brought up James' party.

"Who's invited to his party?"

"Literally everyone is invited for his 22nd birthday. Like all our friends and family. It's going to be a blast," he said.

"Sounds like a lot of fun," I said smiling.

"It really is. There's going to be dancing and drinking and just partying in general," he said listing all the wonderful stuff for James' birthday.

We were walking out on the sidewalks of LA laughing, talking, and telling stories from our past. I learned a lot about him, which was quite interesting.

I was laughing really hard from a joke Kendall said when suddenly we bumped into James and the girl.

My laughter died down and I straightened myself up.

I could see the girl's face clearer now. I stared at her oval face structure. Her teeth were white like snow and she had brown eyes. She was one of the girls from the pictures hanging on James' wall.

I looked to their conjoined hands feeling jealous inside.

"Hey!" Kendall said.

"Hey!"— The girl began— "Is she your girlfriend?"

"No," James answered before I could.

We made eye contact again, but this time I looked away. I didn't look at him again. But I saw his eyes on me the entire time.

The girl turned to me.

"Hey. I'm Cassie," she said extending her hand out.

"Hey. I'm Tati," I said.

"Oh so you're James' friend?" she sounded like she was fitting the last piece to a complex puzzle.

"Yeah, since the day we were born," I said.

"Aw that's amazing," she said.

There was a pause and I was just staring off into the distant. I didn't really know what to say. When the silence became to long Cassie spoke up again.

"Well it was nice talking to you guys. James and I have to go though," she said.

James and her started to move past us.

I couldn't help but to realize Kendall and James whispering something to each other. I wanted to know what it was, but I guess I'll never know.

Once they left we continued our walk.

"He's dating her?" I asked looking back at them.

They were laughing together and holding hands. They looked like a great couple to me.

"I think so. He doesn't really date people though. I don't know. He hasn't told me anything."

"Oh," was all I said.

We walked a little further and then I realized it was getting late.

"I should go," I said.

"Okay. It was fun hanging with you and whatever the deal is with Daniel, I'm always here," he said.

"Thanks."

We said our goodbyes and I departed to my car.

I drove home. It was about ten-thirty at night and I was extremely tired from all the crying. I saw James car parked outside as well.

I walked in the house remembering I needed to give him the envelope Kendall gave me.

The lights were on in the kitchen.

I walked over and found the girl Cassie and James talking with each other. But they didn't seem like they were just talking.

Jealousy was rising from within and I was mad James hadn't told me anything about her. He should've said something before I allowed myself to develop feelings for him. I'm almost sure I wouldn't have if he had told me there was another girl in his life.

I saw James hands on her bare tanned legs rubbing up and down and her arms wrapped around his neck, her fingers fondling with the back of his hair. They looked like they were going to make out anytime soon and I didn't want to stall here like a troll and watch them kiss. First, that was gross. Second, it would make me more jealous. He licked his lip as he eyed her up and down and she laughed flirtatiously.

I rolled my eyes and turned away from the kitchen thinking I'd probably just give it to him in the morning.

I was halfway out of sight when James called me.

"Tati?"

"Hey. Um, Kendall told me to give this to you," I said.

"Oh thanks." He said taking the envelop from my hands.

"Are you okay?" he whispered under his breath.

"Yeah. I'm just tired is all," I lied.

But the truth is, I'm hurt. Hurt from Daniel and hurt from James.

"Are you sure?"

With James he always knew when something was bothering me.

"Yeah. I'm going to bed. You don't want to keep Cassie waiting," I said retreading from the kitchen.

He looked at me confused.

"Goodnight Cassie!" I said before disappearing from the kitchen.

I knew James wanted to ask what I meant, but I didn't want to talk to him. I just needed to sleep. My eyes were so tired; they were soon going to close at any moment.

"Goodnight!" I heard her call out.

As I made my way up the stairs to my room all I could think about was how much I hated guys.

First, the problem with Daniel had me heart broken and feeling empty inside. And then James had me feeling jealous just because he was with another girl.

It made no sense at all though. James and I had moments. And our almost kiss had to have meant something. He can't just push that memory away and all our moments we've had. He likes me. I'm almost positive he does. So why is he with some other girl? And why hasn't he told me anything about her?

And yet, I still loved Daniel. We were truly perfect for each other and we probably would've stayed longer together if he hadn't have been so stupid to cheat on him.

Why do break-ups always hurt the most?

I got in bed and fall asleep with all these mixed feelings about two guys in my life.


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER 7**

**James Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

I didn't know what Tati meant when she said that I didn't want to keep Cassie waiting. I wanted to ask her, but I couldn't leave Cassie sitting alone in the kitchen. It would just be rude.

After Tati left, I went back to Cassie standing in the same position I was before.

"Where were we?" she said placing her hands on my shirt and pulling me closer to her.

I really wanted to know what Tati meant. It was bothering me.

As I stared into Cassie's eyes, all I could think about was Tati.

Earlier today I didn't want her to see me at Starbucks because I was with Cassie. I hadn't told Tati about her, but I probably should've.

I was also wondering why she met up with a guy. She didn't even know anyone here, how could it have been that she was talking to someone?

But when she and the guy kissed, it scared me at first and I was going to go over there and beat the hell out of him, but then it occurred to me that it must've been Daniel. Either way, I still felt like going over there and beating the shit out of him for hurting Tati.

When I was watching her leave Starbucks, I saw tension in her face. She was upset about something. But I didn't know what it was. Something happened. I needed to talk to her, to know what was happening.

"What is it?" Cassie asked.

"Nothing."

I placed my hands on her waist reassuring her that it was nothing. She smiled.

I pulled her in and we started to make out. I picked her up and walked over to the couch. I got on top of her as we kissed passionately. But the whole time, I was thinking of Tati.

Cassie stayed until one in the morning at my house watching movies together that night. Well not watch. More like make out many times.

When she left, I kissed her goodbye and headed up to my room still thinking about Tati.

I felt bad for Tati because I know she was having her boy trouble. Honestly, I thought she wasn't going to do anything today because before I left to meet up with Cassie, she was lying hopelessly in bed eating the chocolate and ice cream I had left her.

She looked so cute watching TV, I just wanted to join her and comfort her and tell her that I loved her and would never hurt her in any way.

But that was never going to happen. I can't tell her that. She just got out of a relationship. It would all be too much if I admitted my love for her.

However, there was something she hasn't told me yet. I'm hoping she'll tell me tomorrow.

I just needed to talk to Tati.

**Tatiana's Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

The next day, my phone was filled with texts and missed calls of Daniel. I could feel the tears starting to form in the corner of my eye. But I had to be strong.

I sighed and walked downstairs to the kitchen.

I was always missing dinner for some reason. I needed to stop doing that because I was always extremely hungry in the morning.

I heard commotion in the kitchen. Who was up around seven in the morning anyways?

I walked in the kitchen seeing James preparing himself a cup of coffee. He was heating the water. What was he doing awake?

When he turned around, he saw me making my way to the kitchen.

"Hey," he said.

"Good morning."

"How are you feeling?"

"I don't know."

To be honest, I felt like giving up on everything. First of all Daniel cheated on me. Second of all, James was making me fall for him. Third of all, I broke up with Daniel and fourth of all, James is with a new girl he never told me about?

I guess I would be feeling jealous, angry, melancholy, and confused. But I didn't want to tell James all of this.

"I saw you at Starbucks yesterday."

Yeah so did I. And you were with another girl that you chose to keep a secret from me.

"Yeah I was with Daniel."

James gave me a look like that was the most astonishing news ever.

"Really? What happened?"

I took a deep breath in.

"I broke up with him."

"Really?" he asked.

I nodded

"I'm sorry."

"It's whatever."

But it really wasn't. It was the complete opposite. I was mad at Daniel for cheating on me, and I knew that getting over him would be hard and take a while.

"And what about you? Why didn't you tell me you had a girlfriend?" I asked.

"Cassie is not my girlfriend."

"Then what is she?"

"A friend."

"With benefits?" I questioned.

"Something like that."

So this was the guy that James grew up to be: a guy who messed around with girls. All guys seemed to do this with girls. When will they ever learn to grow up and realize that we aren't toys?

"What are you going to do with that sweater?" he asked.

He was talking about the sweater I had originally planned on giving to Daniel, but since I ended things with him, I had no one to give it to.

"Keep it to myself," I said.

He laughed and our eyes instantly locked with each other. The feeling he always made me feel when we looked to each other's eyes was indescribable.

This was the kind of thing that has me confused. James has a friend with benefits relationship with a girl and yet he choses to flirt with me. Boys. Confusing as always.

Our eyes never lost contact and I smiled finally looking away.

I had an urge to ask him if he liked me. I wanted to know already. I knew I had feelings for him, but I didn't fully like him. He was cute and I thought he was attractive, but I didn't fully like him. At least, I'm pretty sure I didn't.

Either way, I knew I could never love James. I was still dealing with Daniel who still wanted to be with me, but I didn't. He messed up our relationship and I hated him for that.

"Any plans for today?" I asked.

"Cassie might come over later for a bonfire tonight here with the guys too," James said.

"Awesome."

I got up from the chairs and walked inside.

Great. Cassie was going to come over. Again. Hopefully this time, I wouldn't be able to see them do anything that would just make me jealous.

I walked back to my room and plopped down on my bed. As soon as my head hit the soft pillow I realized I was still tired and fell asleep. I was still sad that our friendship wasn't the same as it was before. What happened to the good times? The days when we were perfect for each other? The days when we were friends?

When I woke up it was three in the afternoon and I went back downstairs. I hadn't seen my parents around lately or James' parents either. They were always out. Either that, or I was.

I found James sitting on the couch watching TV.

"Hey," I said joining him.

I sat down next to him and he straightened his body up a bit. He had his feet elevated on the coffee table in front of him.

"Did you just wake up from a nap?" he asked.

"Yeah. I was still tired and needed a nap."

"I'm tired too," he said yawning.

We watched TV sitting side by side.

I was so focused on the show we were watching, I even forgot I was with James until he shifted in his seat. He laid his head on my lap and looked up to me.

When I decided to look down to him he smiled.

"Go ahead," I told him.

We watched TV the rest of the afternoon together sitting on the couch. James fell asleep with his head on my lap. I couldn't move because I would wake him up and I didn't want to. He looked like a sweet angel sleeping. His tender face that looks smooth and perfect.

Our parents then arrived with groceries in their arms.

"Hey sweetie!" James' mom said.

She placed the bags in the kitchen.

"Hey!" I said.

She walked her way over to where I was sitting when she found James sleeping on me.

She started to laugh which woke up James. He groaned as he turned around so that he was facing my stomach.

He grabbed my waist like it was a teddy bear and pressed his cheek against it and fell asleep again.

"He's crazy," she mouthed to me.

"I know," I mouthed back.

Hours later it was seven in the evening and they would soon be here for the bonfire.

"James wake up," I said shaking him a little.

"Hmmm?" he said keeping his eyes closed.

"They're soon going to be here," I told him.

"Ten more minutes."

"Let me get up at least," I said.

He got up and I stood up. He fell back down on the couch and hugged a pillow while he fell asleep again.

Everyone was outside cooking the meat and preparing the bonfire. They had a special place to put all the wood in. I couldn't wait to see how it would look like tonight.

The doorbell rang.

I went over to open it and found Kendall, Logan and Carlos standing together.

"Hey guys!" I said welcoming them in.

Each one of them hugged me and said hey.

"Where's James?" Carlos asked.

"Sleeping."

"Lazy ass" Kendall said.

We all laughed as we made our way to the family room in which James and I were watching TV.

"Kendall you're not slick," James said.

"Whoa! You're awake," Kendall said pointing out the obvious.

"Yeah and I heard you," he said.

We all laughed.

"Lets all go outside," Logan suggested.

"Has Cass arrived yet?" James asked quietly to me.

"No."

But just then, the doorbell rang.

"I'll go get it," he said leaving the group.

I went with the guys outside to get our spots for the bonfire. The guys and I all sat near each other as we talked about James' party tomorrow.

I hadn't even noticed James and Cassie sitting next to each other talking about something.

We ate our meat and they lighted up the fire. It looked beautiful especially since it was at night. The fire really stood out.

"Hey, go give this one to James," Logan said handing me an ice-cold beer.

"Alright," I said.

I turned around to walk in the direction they were in. It was dark outside and the fire didn't light up the place completely.

When I got closer I almost dropped the beer.

This time, they weren't just touching each other. They were full on lips against lips making out. I got so jealous inside I wanted to scream. I saw the way James hands explored her body and her hands moving around his back. I saw the way she pressed her body against his.

I was beyond jealous right now. I wanted to lock myself in my room and never come out.

I placed the beer next to his chair and walked away. Hopefully they didn't see me.

"You guys sent me over there and they were making out," I told them.

They began to laugh really hard. Of course, they were a bit tipsy right now.

"Sorry," Logan said.

I sat down in my chair as I listened to the rest of their conversation.

**James Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

I saw Tati sitting with the guys wishing I could be sitting with them. Every time she hangs out with them, I feel like they are better friends to her than I am. It annoys me sometimes because she is my friend. I should be the one by Tati's side.

I spotted the beer that I'm pretty sure Tati brought over. I started to drink it.

I don't even know if Tati likes me, but I wish I did. It seems like she does, but then again I don't really know.

Cassie is really cute though and we've dated before.

We recently started seeing each other again when I found her walking in the streets of LA. We talked about how she still thought about me and I did too. So we decided to have a friend with benefits relationship and see where it would take us.

I'm not sure if I should ask Cassie to be my girlfriend because I liked Tati too. I don't know whom I like more, but right now I like both of them equally.

Tati was drinking something, most likely beer, and she laughed really hard at something that Kendall said.

"Can't wait for tomorrow," Cassie said snapping me out of my thoughts.

I was so focused on Tati; I had forgotten that I was with Cassie.

"Yeah. I'm excited for it," I told her.

"The guys tell me you're going to love it."

"Oh am I?" I asked and she laughed.

She took a sip of her beer as we watched the fire.

"Can we go inside?" she asked.

I nodded.

We both got up and held hands as we walked back inside.

I was still watching Tati, but I couldn't help but get jealous when I saw her and Kendall sitting really close to each other. She even laid her head on his shoulder and it pissed me off.

"James," Cassie called from behind.

I saw them. Happy. Looking like a couple. And I hated them for it. I rolled my eyes and walked inside with Cassie wanting to forget what I just saw. I hope it was nothing. Kendall, knowing my problems, wouldn't do anything to betray me. I hope he doesn't.


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER 8**

**Tatiana's Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

I was sitting with the guys that night telling stories. I learned a lot about each one of them. They were so funny and nice. They were good people. I liked them.

After they left at one in the morning, I went to bed and fell asleep.

Tomorrow was James' birthday and I had the perfect idea. I was going to make him his favorite red velvet cupcakes.

The next day, I woke up at six in the morning to make him the cupcakes as a surprise. I got out of bed in my pajamas as I went downstairs quietly making sure I wouldn't wake anyone up.

I got out all the ingredients and started to mix it together. I preheated the oven and moments later the cupcakes were cooking themselves. When twenty minutes passed by, I checked them and they looked perfect. I took them out and let them cool down for about ten minutes. Afterwards, I put them all on a big plate.

I took the plate upstairs to his room. I opened the door with one hand and carried the cupcakes on the other.

He was sleeping with the covers tucked tightly over his head. I placed the cupcakes on his dresser and walked over to his bed.

I took the blankets off his face and he looked so cute when he was sleeping. I just wanted to sleep in with him in his arms.

"James," I said.

He turned around.

"James," I called again shaking him a little now.

Nothing. He continued to sleep.

"Wake up," I said.

"Ten more minutes," he said pulling the covers over his face again.

"Nope."

I grabbed the blankets and pulled them off him. He turned and gave me a look, which made me smile.

"Happy birthday," I said.

He smiled.

"Thanks."

"I made your favorite red velvet cupcakes."

"You did?" He asked happily.

"Yeah, here you go."

I handed him the plate containing the cupcakes.

"Whoa, thanks!" he said taking one.

He started to eat it.

"This is really good. Aren't you going to have some?" he said picking one up and handing it to me.

"Thanks."

I took it and began to eat. It tasted pretty good.

"Hey Tati," James said and I turned around to look at him.

My face was met with the icing of his cupcake as he smeared it all over my face. He started to laugh and I glared at him.

"I hate you."

"Love you too," he joked.

I shook my head.

I tried getting him back, but he pushed my hands away.

He laughed in my face and I rolled my eyes.

"You can't get me," he teased.

"Whatever. I gotta go," I said.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"I just need to go out," I said and with that I left.

I needed to get his gift.

**James Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

Once Tati left, I checked my phone. It was really early in the morning. I didn't expect anyone to be awake, but Kendall had already texted me. He was always the one to wake up early no matter what day it was.

He texted me "Happy birthday!"

I responded: _Thanks._

_No problem. Hey has Cassie told you if she's coming?_

_Yeah she is._

His next text kind of surprised me.

_Do you seriously like her again?_

_I don't know._

_What about Tati?_

_I don't know,_ I texted again.

_Well you can't always be pushing Tati away. You're doing that too much._

_No I'm not._

_Who were you with yesterday?_

_Cassie._

_And only her. You didn't even talk to Tati. If I were you, I'd be with Tati and not some skank. Cassie is always taking you away from everyone and us. And you know it._

_I just like them both._

_You can't have them both._

_I know._

_All right. Well, see you later punk._

His last text made me laugh. He always told me that because once in an interview, I embarrassed him so badly.

I got out of bed and walked to Tati's room. She wasn't there. Her bed was made and I could smell her scent even though she wasn't there.

Tati is so sweet and perfect. Kendall was right. I should be with her. So why am I still with Cassie? It was her idea to try and be back together. I should've just said no, but my stupidity answered yes for me.

I sat on her bed thinking of what I should do. Who should I be with? I liked Cassie, but Tati was always there. I did fall for Tati all over again. She is the one and since I know that, tonight at the party I'm leaving Cassie and ending things with her. I love Tati and I'm going to be with her. I'm taking the chance I should've taken a while ago. I wanted her eight years ago and eight years later to present time; she's going to be mine.

**Tatiana's Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

It was really early in the morning so I decided to get some coffee at Starbucks.

I sat in the coffee shop thinking of things to get James for about an hour and a half.

It was nine now and I went out to go look for stores to shop at. I needed to get James something, but I had no idea as to what I should get him.

I got out my phone and texted Kendall.

_Hey what should I get James?_

Within minutes, he responded: _don't get him anything_.

_But I want to get him something._

_Trust me, he wouldn't want anything. _

_What about money?_

_He has enough money. Just don't get him anything. He would feel bad that you spent your money on him. But tonight wear something fancy. _

_Okay fine. Thanks._

Great. I needed to dress fancy. But I didn't bring a dress that was party material because I didn't think I'd need it. However, now I do. Good thing I had cash on me, otherwise I'd be screwed.

I walked into a store containing all sorts of dresses. I tried on so many and I fell in love with a red one. I even purchased some gold heels to go along with it. I had my jewelry at home.

Once I bought what I needed, I headed back home.

When I got to the house, everyone was awake and moving around.

I walked to the family room, where everyone was.

"Hey sweetheart, are you coming with us to help get everything ready at his house?" my mom asked.

"Sure, can I bring my stuff? I bought a dress and heels."

"Oh good. Yeah we're all bringing our stuff."

"Cool let me go get my other stuff."

I walked upstairs to my room and began to pack the stuff I needed to bring. I was pretty excited myself for his party. Even though I'd probably not know anyone there, it still seemed like it was going to be amazing.

Suddenly I heard someone knock on the door and I turned around to see James standing in the doorway.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey, what're you doing?"

"Nothing. I mean, I'm just cleaning up a little," I said trying not to give him too much information away.

"Do you want to do something today?" He asked.

I grabbed my phone and dialed my mom's number.

I didn't want to say no because it was his birthday and I sort of did want to hang out with him.

"Um hold on," I said walking into the bathroom.

"Almost ready?" I heard my mom say as she spoke through the phone.

"Yeah, but James wants to hang with me today,"

"Just go with him and afterwards come straight to the party. Leave your bag by the door though."

"Okay thanks mom."

I hung up and walked out of the bathroom to find James in the same spot, leaning in the doorway.

"Yeah, let's do it," I smiled to him.

"Cool I'll be in my room. Come get me when you're ready."

He left and I continued to pack my stuff very quickly. I grabbed my make-up bag and jewelry bag. I put my dress and shoes in the bag as well.

When I was done I left it by my door and walked over to James' room.

"Let's go," I said and he turned his TV off.

We started to walk downstairs to the kitchen.

When we reached the bottom floor I asked, "What did you want to do?"

"Maybe have a picnic by the lake," he said making his way to the kitchen.

I followed closely behind.

"There's the birthday boy," his dad said.

Everyone then said their happy birthdays and gave him hugs.

"Hey mom, I'm going out," James said to his mom.

"Okay. Remember six," she reminded him and he nodded.

He grabbed the basket most likely containing our food and a blanket.

We walked to his car and got in.

"Where are we going?"

"Castaic Lake," he said.

I got comfortable in his car seat and looked out the window.

Suddenly I was thinking about Daniel. But I hated him so much. He's whatever now. I don't care about him. I guess the break up didn't really have its long gloomy feeling for me because I liked someone else. And that someone else was James. Because unlike him, James was always there for me.

When we got the lake, James got out the basket and blanket and set up on a grassy area close to the lake.

He got out the food and laid everything out nicely.

"What'd you pack in there friend?" I asked.

"Well I made BLT sandwiches," he said sounding proud of him self.

I laughed. "Awesome."

We began to eat.

"And I packed Gatorade for drinks."

"I like Gatorade." I smiled to him while munching on my sandwich.

It didn't taste that bad though.

"Yeah, it's kind of a 'thank you for making me cupcakes' lunch I guess," James said.

"You didn't have to," I told him.

He shrugged like it was no big deal.

"So how's the birthday boy?"

"Great," he laughed, "And you?"

"I'm good," I told him, "You pumped for tonight?"

"Hell yeah I am," he said.

We laughed together as we finished up our sandwiches.

"So I went out today," I began.

"Swear if you bought me anything, I'm going to be so mad," he said.

I laughed. "I was about to, but I texted Kendall and he told me not to," I told him.

"Good," he said laughing.

We drank in silence as the people around us were swimming, laughing and walking around.

"I have an idea," James suddenly said getting up.

"Great, here come the ideas."

He was a master when it came to ideas. When we were younger, he would always think of crazy things to do such as the idea to climb on my roof and watch the sunset.

He was smiling at me, standing in front of me. I looked up to him.

"Yes?"

"Lets go swim in the lake?"

I looked at him like he was insane.

"No! I'm in my clothes!" I said.

"So am I, but that's not stopping me."

"James."

"Tati," he mocked, "Do it for my birthday."

"You're crazy."

"I know, but so are you! That's why we're friends."

I laughed and looked at him for along time.

"I hate you and your ideas," I said.

"No you love me," he said.

"Sure that's what it is."

"So is that a yes?" he asked giving me a hopeful look, begging me to say yes.

"Please? Tator tots?" he asked again.

I laughed.

"Fine, just because it's your birthday."

He gave me his hand to help me up and we walked over to the lake. He took off his shirt and started to get in not letting go of my hand. That was a smart move. I'd probably just let him go in by himself.

The water wasn't cold at all, most likely from the sun beaming down.

I was now deep in the water with James. He finally let go and stood a few feet away. The water was up to my chest and I was still able to stand.

"This is crazy," I said.

"Pretty much sums up our friendship," he smiled.

He swam a little farther away from me.

"Hey Tati. What if something from underneath just grabs you?" he asked.

"James, stop. You know I get scared when that happens," I told him.

He laughed.

"Tati watch out!" he suddenly yelled pointing in my direction.

I turned around expecting something to hit me like a ball, but nothing. I turned back to James, but he was gone. Where the hell did he go? Crap.

I started to look everywhere among all the other people in the water.

"James," I tired calling.

I couldn't see him anywhere. Where did he go?

I was starting to get worried.

I decided that I should get out and wait by our picnic area but just then something grabbed my waist from behind and I screamed splashing the water like a maniac.

James surfaced above the water cracking up.

"James I could've had a heart attack!" I yelled, "And I could've died!" I added to make him feel bad for what he did.

"That would never happen," he said sounding so sure.

"And how do you know?"

"Because I'd never let it happen."

He flashed me his same smile that I had fallen in love with since the beginning.

"Well thanks," I said splashing water on him.

He splashed water back and our splish splash fight began.

We used to this all the time we went to the pool together. He always won every little competition we had, but I didn't mind. I had fun and that's what mattered.

I started to splash him excessively while laughing. I tossed my head back unable to stop laughing.

That's when James made his way over in two easy strokes and grabbed my wrists to avoid any more splashing. I was still laughing as he held me.

He was standing in front of me now.

"You can't splash me now," he said smiling down at me.

"You can't either," I pointed out.

"Really?" he asked and I nodded.

But I was wrong because he shook his hair in my face.

I laughed.

"You jerk," I said.

He still was smiling as he stood inches away from me. He hovered over me like a tower as he looked into my eyes giving me the same look he gave when we were looking at the stars.

I should do it. Clearly he does want to kiss me if he's giving me the same look. But then again he did say that it didn't necessarily mean that he wanted to kiss. I didn't believe it though.

I was questioning whether I should, but then I remembered that he's with Cassie and I didn't want to ruin their relationship.

James must've known what I was thinking.

"Did I give you the look again?" he teased.

I rolled my eyes playfully as I answered, "Yeah you did."

"And so did you," he said before releasing me and splashing me in the face.

He quickly swam away.

"I hate you!" I yelled.

"I love you!" he yelled back.

"Liar!" I told him.

After a while longer in the water we decided to get out. It was three in the afternoon when I checked my phone.

"We should pack our things," I said and he agreed.

We folded the blanket and put away the remaining chips in the basket. He walked it over to his car and put them in the trunk.

"We should dry up first," he suggested.

"Aren't we going to be late?" I asked.

"Oh, someone's ready to party," he teased.

I half laughed.

"Don't worry we can leave in an hour. It takes about two hours from here to get to my house," he said.

"Alright then," I said.

He walked over to a green grassy area and laid down.

"Here," –he held out his shirt to me—" Wear this."

"Thanks."

I took the shirt from him.

"Don't look." I said standing a few feet behind him.

"I'm not," he said.

I could see him smiling.

"Actually, I'll change in the car because there are other people around," I said.

"Okay."

I changed in his car and when I came back I joined him in the grass.

"This has been fun," I said.

"Glad you liked it," he said.

We stayed there for a while longer just watching the people run around and swim. It was fun just being with him there. I closed my eyes and took in the warm sun, drying myself up.

We left the lake around four. I was still a little wet, but I didn't really care.

He drove for two hours straight to his house in San Diego. When we got there, a lot of cars were parked outside.

"Wow, everyone's already here," he said.

We got out and walked to his front door. He unlocked the door and when we came inside, there was no one. That made no sense because of the cars parked outside.

James mom appeared.

"Hey," we both said in unison.

"Go change into your clothes and meet down here in thirty minutes. Tati, your stuff is in James' room," she said.

With that we left to up stairs to his room.

When I walked in, his room was extremely huge I couldn't believe it.

"You can change in here," he said grabbing his stuff and clothes. He left to another room.

Once he was gone, I took off my clothes and took a ten-minute shower. I rinsed my hair with shampoo and conditioner before stepping out. When I got out I dried myself up and then blow-dried my hair. I applied my make-up, lotion, and perfume. Afterwards, I straightened my hair and put on my dress, heels, and jewelry.

I was all set to go.

**James Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

It's finally party time and today has been great spending it with Tati. When I'm with her, everything is better. It feels just right and I love the feeling of having her around.

Tonight, I'm going to leave Cassie and end things between us. What we had once is over and I moved onto someone whom I've always loved.

I put on my suit and fixed myself up after taking a quick hot shower. I applied some cologne and fixed my hair.

When I was done, I took one last in the mirror before walking out.

I knocked on the door to my room waiting for Tati to open it.

I waited a minute before she opened and as soon as I saw her, my heart melted to the ground. She was wearing a tight red mini dress and golden heels too, which made her taller. She looked beyond amazing. Her hair was straightened and I fell in love with her even more. I tried not to let my jaw drop, but I couldn't stop myself.

"Wow, you look beautiful," I told her.

"Thanks, you look handsome yourself." She winked jokingly as she walked out of her room.

I laughed softly and thought, she's the one.

She looked lovely tonight and her dress fit perfectly on her. I tried not to eye her up and down, but when I let her walk in front of me, it was all I could do.

When we got to the bottom floor, I turned around to head to the kitchen, but then people were suddenly yelling "Happy birthday!"

This was a total surprise because I wasn't expecting so much people. The entire house was packed with people I worked with and people I knew from the celebrity world.

I spotted the guys together and Tati made her way over to them.

I gave Kendall a look. He motioned his head to Tati who was laughing with Logan and Carlos.

He raised his eyebrows at me and I smiled. I laughed to myself a bit before I saw Cassie.

She was wearing an electric blue dress with black sparkly heels. She looked good herself, but for some reason, I didn't want her to be there. Not to be mean, but it just made everything more complicated. That, and I was having too much fun with Tati, I didn't want it to end.

Kendall was right because all Cassie did was take me away from all the people who actually mattered to me.

I saw Kendall pull Tati away and they began to walk over. Here's my chance. It's now or never and I'm choosing to do it now.

"Hey, Kendall said you needed to tell me something," Tati said.

"Hey," I said already nervous like I was eight years ago when I took her to the movies.

"Um, what I needed to tell you was that—" I began but was interrupted by Cassie.

"James! Happy birthday!" She yelled as she made her way over to me.

She was standing in front of me smiling and then she kissed me. In front of Tati.

I felt like a total bitch to do that in front of Tati. I liked her and I knew she liked me too. I kind of sensed it. We have something and I'm not letting it go because of Cassie.

"Hey, thanks!" I said to Cassie.

I looked over to Kendall and Tati was gone.

I gave him a look asking where she had gone, but he only shrugged his shoulders.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Wrong?" I repeated looking back at Cassie.

As soon as I spoke I realized that my tone of voice had gone from happy to upset.

"Yeah."

"What's wrong is that I'm with you," I told her.

"What?"

"You know Cassie, there are so much better people out there for me and you're not one of them."

"James… what… what are you—"

"I'm saying that it's over and it has been since the day I broke up with you eight months ago," I told her.

"No it's not. We still have something." She argued.

"We really don't. Stop trying to force something that will never happen. I don't have feelings for you anymore, I just don't."

"Why are you doing this James?"

"Because you held me back from my true love."

"I didn't…"

I could tell she was having a hard time to speak, but I was telling her the truth.

"It's over. We ended a while ago and I like someone else. I don't even know why I'm with you."

"Because… because we still… we still like each other… and…"

"No, you might, but not me. I'm sorry it has to end this way," I said backing away from her and disappearing through the crowd.

I felt so free telling her off like that. Like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. I know should've been nicer, but I just had to tell her all of that. All of it was true. I was supposed to be with Tati all this time and Cassie had to ruin it.

It was partially my fault for saying yes, I'd love to try and be back together, but either way, I really liked Tati.

I needed to find Tati, to tell her everything.

**Tatiana's Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

I hated how James was always with Cassie. I was always pushed away from James because of her. It annoyed me so much.

I was outside watching the sunset trying to push all these thoughts aside when someone joined me.

"It's beautiful isn't it?"

It was James.

Just having him stand next to me made me want to be in his arms and nowhere else. But like always, he was with Cassie.

"Yeah," I said.

"Why are you out here?" he asked looking to me.

"It got hot," I lied.

I could tell that he saw right through it because he grabbed my shoulders and turned me around to face him.

"It just started. What's really bothering you?" he asked.

I looked down to the ground unable to say it, unable to ever express my love to him.

He cupped my face in his hands and tilted my head up so that I could look at him. His touch made me feel so relaxed and calm. His skin felt smooth against my cheek as I looked into the hazel eyes I always loved.

"The truth?"

He nodded.

I shook my head. "I can't say it," I said turning away from him and staring at the sunset again.

I couldn't tell him. Everything was just too complicated and I hated it.

Suddenly, I felt him slip has arms around my waist, turning me to face him again. He closed the gap between us, pulling me in and holding me close to him.

"If you can't say what you were going to say, then I'll say what I've been dying to tell you," he said.

"What?" I asked.

There was a long silent pause.

He stared into my eyes.

His breath felt warm on my face when he said, "I love you."


	9. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER 9**

I could've sworn the world stopped moving. I wasn't sure if I heard right. I must've imagined him saying it, but then again, he was holding me close to him like he loved me.

"What?" I asked.

"I love you Tati. I always have. Ever since we lived in New York."

Now it all made sense. When we went out to the movies. Or the times we just walked around Town Square at night. It was because he liked me.

But he has Cassie, why is he telling me he loves me if he has her? That's the only thing that makes me uneasy about hearing James telling me he loves me.

"Why?" I asked.

"Why what?"

"Why do you love me? You have Cassie—"

"I left her," he cut me off. "Kendall told me Cassie was the reason why I've been so distanced from everyone, especially you. And he was right. I've been leaving you for her and I guess I expected you to always stick around while I was with another girl, but I didn't realize how much it hurt you."

"What are you saying it hurt me?" I asked.

"It hurt you because you love me. I'm sorry it took me this long to realize it."

He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and kept his hand on my cheek. He stroked it gently with his thumb.

"It did take you long to realize it. But what sickens me is that you claim you've loved me all this time, and yet you were with another girl. Still," I said.

"I know, I know. I was dumb and stupid. And I don't know what I was thinking. I understand if you can't forgive me, but I just want to let you know that I love you and if you don't, then fine. But I always loved you and never forgot about you. I need you to know that," he continued speaking.

I turned around to face the sunset again, escaping his grip around me. The sun was disappearing behind the horizon and the wind blew softly. I love the breeze in summer time. It made me calm and realized, but this time it didn't because James was telling me he loved me.

I don't know what to possibly to do. James, my best friend, loves me? Is this even real, I asked myself.

Maybe, but right now, I couldn't face him. I love him more than anyone can imagine, but for some reason I couldn't tell him that. It was all too much for me. I couldn't listen to him. I needed some space to process everything in.

"Even if I was with other girls, I always remembered you. I never broke the promise eight years ago."

I froze.

I got a flashback from eight years ago at the airport when he was leaving. I was wearing my hair in a ponytail with shorts and a teal top and James was in a grey sweater and jeans, holding his bags ready to leave.

"Promise you won't forget about me?" I had asked him

"Promise," he said to me.

And then we hugged for the last time before he left.

That was the one promise he never broke. He never forgot about me. He kept the promise I thought he wouldn't keep.

I turned around to face him.

"Tati, listen to me," he said.

I walked back over to him and hugged him tightly like I did when he was moving.

He was the type of guy I wanted to have. A guy who never forgets anything. A guy who will always be there no matter how far they ever are. And James was that one guy who had me in his thoughts the eight years we grew apart. I would've guessed he forgot about me, but he didn't. He always remembered me.

If he hadn't had moved, we probably would've ended up together. We understood each other well. Daniel could never figure out if something was wrong with me when I was conflicted, but James always could. James and I had a special bond no one could understand.

"I just can't believe you waited so long to tell me." I said still in his arms.

"I may have moved, but I never, not once, forgot about you."

I smiled looking up at him.

"James I love you too," I finally admitted to him.

"I thought I'd never hear you say that," he said pulling me in for a longer embrace.

"Lets go back inside. This is your party," I mentioned.

He nodded as he held my hand.

We walked inside and the music was already playing loudly. Everyone was laughing and dancing.

"Hey! There's the birthday boy!" Kendall showed up standing in front of us holding a cup of beer in his hand.

He looked down to our joined hands and looked back at us?

"Are you guys..." He trailed off.

James looked at me and I looked up at him.

"Yeah we are," James said with out his eyes never leaving mine.

If I could, I would kiss him right there. But I didn't. He probably read my mind because he smiled.

"Oh Tati," he said.

"What?" I smiled.

"I know what you were thinking."

" I—"

"Shh," he said cutting me off. "Want to go dance?"

"Sure," I said.

He placed his hand on my back and led me through the crowd of people. Some smiled at us and stopped to say happy birthday to him.

He finally turned around to face me and we started dancing together. We must've been there for hours just dancing. People offered us drinks, but I only had one cup so far. I didn't want to get tipsy or worse, drunk.

People were already drunk from the shots they were taking.

At one point the dancing got very intense between James and I. Before we were dancing face-to-face keeping his hands on my waist, but then he grabbed my waist and pulled me closer to him turning me around in the process.

Of course I had experiencing in grinding from back in my senior year and college parties, so this time wasn't any different. It seemed like he had a lot of energy because he was going hard dancing on me.

When it was time to cut the cake, the music stopped and everyone shuffled over to the kitchen. James never let go of my hand as he made his way to the table. Everyone was smiling and having a good time.

We sang happy birthday and he stood in front of his cake smiling at everyone.

He even looked at me at one time and winked. I smiled at him.

When the singing was all done, he looked down to his cake.

"Don't forget to make a wish!" someone yelled from afar.

He made his wish before blowing out the candle. The room bursted into applause and laughter. This was one awesome party, I thought to myself.

He smiled as he cut into the cake. He got his piece and then cut mine. He handed it to me as we walked out to the living room couches. He left his mom to distribute the rest of the cake. We sat on the same couch side by side.

I could see the sweat from all the dancing we did on James face. It was really hot and I was sweaty too.

I looked at James while he ate. He didn't even notice that I was looking at him.

"What?" He said finally looking up.

"Nothing."

"So what did you wish for?" I asked nudging his elbow.

"I'm not telling you," he said taking another bite of his cake.

"Why not?"

"Because then it won't come true," he said looking at me.

"What did it have to do with?"

"Why do you want to know so badly?" he asked.

"Because I do."

"Tati, I'll tell you what it was when it comes true."

"I guess," I said.

We both looked away from each other.

I looked down to the icing on my cake and suddenly had the idea to smush the icing on his face to get him back from all the times he has gotten me.

"Hey James."

He looked up to face me and before he could do anything, my cake was met with his face. I rubbed it all over his face, ensuring that it covered every inch of his face.

I started to laugh.

"Gotcha," I said.

"Really?"

I smiled at him.

"Come here," he ordered.

I shook my head.

He grabbed my hand, but before he could secure a grip on it, I snatched them away from him.

"Tati. You're not slick. You know I win these competitions," he said.

I rolled my eyes and laughed more.

"Only because I let you," I joked.

He stood up and slowly walked over to stand in front of me.

I looked up at him. His face was covered with the red icing from my cake.

I only laughed harder.

He bent over and placed his hands on top of the pillows of the couches I was leaning on. His face was in front of mine.

"What are you doing?" I asked him.

He only smiled down at me.

"James, if you're thinking about-" I didn't finish because then his face was being rubbed against my face, the icing getting all over.

"James!" I yelled trying to push him away, but I couldn't. He was too strong.

I had a feeling he was going to do that.

My face was covered with icing now. He laughed as he got up.

"Gotcha," he mocked.

"Screw you."

He laughed as he sat back down and ate his cake.

When we were done, he got us napkins and we wiped the icing off.

Soon we were back dancing in the same position we left off. His hands were on my waist as we grind to the beat of the music slowly getting rougher by the second.

We danced for a little more before we decided to go outside to catch our breaths.

"Well don't you like to dance," James said taking a seat on a deck chair.

"You're the one that grabbed me," I countered.

"But you liked it," he said raising his eyebrows.

I made a face at him and he laughed.

"You're cute," he said.

"I know what your intentions are."

He looked up at me.

"I have no intentions, but I think some one might," he joked.

"Shut up," I said playfully punching him on his arm.

I scooted over next to him and laid my head on his shoulder and held his hand on my lap.

It was eleven at night. Outside it was warm, but not hot like it was before.

"Did you go to your prom?" he asked.

"Yeah, senior year with my boyfriend."

"Oh so you had another boyfriend."

"Yeah his name was Steven, but we only dated for like four months," I said.

He nodded.

"And what about you? Did you go to prom?" I asked.

"Yup, all four years," he said.

"Oh look who's Mr. Popular," I teased.

"Well what can I say?" he joked. "But yeah prom was awesome," he continued.

"Yeah it was," I agreed.

For some reason I started thinking of the day I was going to leave, which was in three weeks. It felt like the days were going to pass by really quickly and I didn't want to leave James.

My best friend was now my boyfriend. It was unbelievable.

"Whatcha thinking about?" James asked catching me off guard.

"Nothing."

"Don't be stubborn," he teased.

"I'm not stubborn!" I complained.

"Tati, yes you are," he said smiling.

I stuck my tongue out at him.

"Tell me," he pleaded.

"It's nothing. Don't worry about it," I said.

"Fine," he said, "Do you want to go to the beach?" James asked. "It's like two minutes away. We can walk there," he added.

"Alright let's do it."

We got up and walked through the drunk and high dancing crowd.

"Hey we're are you guys going?" James' mom appeared out of nowhere.

"We're going to the beach real quick," he said.

"Alright. Try to be back before one though."

"All right mom," he said pulling me out along with him.

He held my hand as we walked to the beach. I could already hear the water out in the distance.

He was right. The beach was really close to his house.

"You're so lucky you live on the beach."

"It's really cool," he said.

We stepped onto the smooth, cool sand. I was carrying my heels in my hands while my other was still in James'.

"This is amazing." I said.

We walked closer to the ocean.

"We're not getting in," I told him.

"I wouldn't let you even if I got in. Don't want to destroy your dress," he said gently tapping my nose.

I smiled and walked a little closer to the water. James was behind me.

The cold water barely touched my feet, and it felt relaxing.

James came from behind and wrapped his arms around me, placing his head on my shoulder. I leaned into him. He gave me a quick kiss on the cheek as we watched the light of the moon reflect on the ocean water.

I looked up to face him. His face was close to mine. He looked gorgeous than any person I have ever met.

We both smiled at each other and I looked away.

I never wanted to let go. I wanted to stay in this position forever, but I learned from the hard way, forever doesn't always last.

I felt him looking at me.

"You're really pretty," he whispered softly into my ear.

It was just the two of us standing in the middle of the night at the beach.

Good thing it was dark out, otherwise he would've teased me for blushing.

I turned around to face him.

"You just have a way with your words don't you."

"And my looks," he joked.

He bit his lower lip as he eyed me up and down. I laughed.

"Is that how you show girls you like what you see," I said.

"Yeah and I really do like what I see," he said, his eyes finally meeting with mine.

Before I could say anything, his lips met with mine and he kissed me softly, his hands running through my hair.

It surprised me that he was kissing me, but then I started kissing him back. I felt like I was in another world.

It was a long sweet deep kiss.

"I'm glad I can finally do that." He whispered in between our kiss.

His breath felt warm against my face.

"Yeah, you've waited a while haven't you?" I teased pulling away.

Our foreheads were pressed against each other; feeling like nothing could separate us.

I pulled him in and kissed him longer. His hands were now on my waist as we kissed under the moonlight hearing the waves softly crash onto the shore.

He broke away the kiss this time leaving me wanting more. I didn't want to stop.

"That's all?" I asked bummed.

"Well look who likes my kisses."

"Don't get cocky," I told him.

He let go of me.

"I'm not."

"You are too."

He rolled his eyes and smiled.

"Fine," he said.

He gave me a peck on the lips.

"Much better," I told him.

"Let's go back," he said.

We walked together back to his house.

Occasionally, he would stop and just kiss me.

"You sure you're not the one who likes my kisses?"

"I'm sure," he said smiling and kept kissing me.

When we got to the house, we could hear the blasting music. We walked into the house and people were drunk. Some were passed out on the couches already and the others were still drinking, yelling, dancing and acting crazy.

James' mom appeared with a guy standing next to her. I recognized him a little, but wasn't quite sure who it was.

"Philip!" James said.

It was his brother. He had also changed a lot. Just like James had.

James immediately went over to hug him really tightly. His mom was smiling watching her two sons hug.

"Hey happy birthday!" Philip said to James.

Then he looked towards me and smiled.

"Hey," he said to me, giving me a hug as well.

"Hey," I said.

"Wait so James, is she your new girlfriend?" I heard him whisper to James.

"Yeah remember Tati from New York?" James asked.

"No that is not her," he said amazed.

"It is," James said laughing.

"You've changed a lot!" he said talking to me now.

"Yeah so have you," I said.

"I literally didn't recognize you though. Hey do you mind if I borrow James from you for a little," he asked.

"Yeah it's fine," I said.

He pulled James away into the crowd of dancing people.

I walked to the kitchen to get something cool to drink. I grabbed a can of coke and opened it.

"Hey there you are," someone said from behind.

I turned around to find Logan and Kendall walking over to me.

"Hey."

"Where did you guys go?" Kendall asked with his words slurred.

"The beach."

"Really? With out us?" Logan asked sounding exactly like Kendall.

"He just said let's go and we went," I told them sipping on my coke.

"Hey, why don't you have some," Kendall said offering me his cup.

"No thanks," I said. "I have coke."

"Suit yourself," he said chugging it down.

"Where is James?" Logan asked.

"He went somewhere with his brother," I explained.

Just then James appeared walking over to me.

"Hey where did you go?" I asked.

"My brother and his friends made me dance with them," he said.

"Are Kendall and Logan?" James began asked in a low voice to me and I nodded.

Kendall was filling up another cup of beer for Logan and himself. Logan was looking at these girls dancing.

"Dude, lets go dance. I see someone I like," Kendall said.

"You read my mind. Lets go," Logan said walking away.

We both laughed at them.

James turned to face me when they were gone.

"Hey babe."

"I'm your babe now?"

"Yup," he said smiling at me.

He took the coke I had placed on the counter and began drinking it.

"I mean I guess it's okay," I said.

He laughed as he drank the rest of my coke, leaving nothing.

"Someone was thirsty," I said.

"I really was especially from all that dancing with you," he teased.

I laughed.

"Ha ha. Funny," I said sarcastically.

He placed the empty can of coke down on the counter and moved closer to me.

"You are a very good dancer," he said softly.

I placed my arms around his neck.

"Thanks."

He had his hands on my waist when he pulled me towards him and started kissing me. His kisses were becoming more as we started to make out.

He picked me up easily and placed me on the counter.

His hands were on my waist slowly going down to my legs. He was getting rougher the more we kissed. I had my hands around his neck as we continued to make out.

"James!" someone called out from behind. It sounded like a girl.

James didn't seem to hear it or he ignored it because he was immune to the make out session we were having.

"James," I said.

"Hm?" he said still kissing me.

"Someone is waiting to talk to you."

He sighed and turned around.

"Happy birthday bro!" the girl said.

It was Ali, his sister. Last time I saw her was when I was ten. She had gone away to college and occasionally I'd see her around holidays, but that was about it.

"Hey sis! I thought you weren't going to make it because of your job!" James said.

"Surprise!" she said.

They hugged each other. Meanwhile, I hopped off the counter.

"Hey. Wait I know you from somewhere," she said pointing at me. "Is she famous?" she asked James.

"No, it's Tati," James said.

"You mean Tati, your tator tots?" she asked him.

"Yeah," he said.

"Oh my gosh Tati!" she said walking over to me and giving me a tight hug. "It's been a long time! Look at you all grown up! You're so pretty!" she said.

I smiled.

"Thanks! So are you," I told her.

"Remember when I teased you guys about liking each other?" she asked smiling at the both of us.

James laughed and nodded.

"Look who are actually together now," she said.

This time we both laughed.

"Yeah," James said.

"How long?" she asked.

"Today actually," I answered.

"And you're already getting freaky," she teased.

"Shut up," James said, both laughing.

"It's all good. I'm going to go say hi to Philip and see what he's up to. I'll let you two be alone," she said walking away.

James smiled at me. "Look at how many people think my girl is pretty," he said.

I laughed. "Your brother and sister actually came," I said.

"I know. I didn't expect them to show up. Hey do you want to go dance?" He asked.

"Only if you want to," I said.

He took hold of my hand and pulled me with him.

It amazed me how long people could dance too while still being drunk. We walked by a group of people playing beer pong. Some people were making out as well. It was a crazy party, but it was fun.

We started dancing again. That's all we did for the rest of the night.

It was four in the morning when people finally started to clear out. But the music kept playing and James was finally drunk from the cups his friends handed to him.

We both sat next to each other on a couch in the family room.

"This night was fucking amazing," he said holding beer in his hand.

"Yeah it was." I agreed.

I had restricted myself to drink tonight because I knew James would get drunk. I didn't want to end up like he was. He looked like he could pass out at any minute.

James' mom was clearing everyone out. By the time it was five, the house was quiet and outside, the sky was turning blue again. Soon the sun would be rising.

She came over to us.

"Why don't you just take him upstairs," she said.

"Okay," I said getting up.

"James lets go," I said holding his arm trying to pull him up.

"Where are we going?"

"To your room."

"Okay let me just grab another beer from the fridge."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because you already drank a lot tonight."

"You're right."

We turned the corner to walk in the hallway leading to the staircase. He bumped into the wall a few times. I was finding it a little hard to make him walk because he was wobbly. Half the time he wanted to turn right or left when he'd only crash into a wall.

"Sorry," I would say, but he was so drunk, he probably didn't feel it. He probably didn't even hear me.

Going up the stairs was a struggle. He would always lean backwards and I was afraid he would fall backwards. Thankfully I was clutching onto his arm and back to support him.

We reached the top of the stairs and went to his room.

"Are you staying?" he asked as I placed him onto his bed.

"No."

"Why not? Just stay with me. Look there's enough room," he said pointing to his bed.

I didn't answer him.

"Come on?" he pleaded.

"Fine," I said getting in bed with him.

I turned off the lights and got under the covers.

He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head before we both drifted off into a deep sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N:** Sorry it has taken me a while to post this chapter! Almost a month, or well last time I posted _was_ a month ago.. but pretty much school has had me extremely busy with homework and everything, but I have chapter 10 ready so here it is! And i'm working on chapter 11 as well so that might be up maybe tomorrow night or Wednesday or Thursday. If they're not, I'm extremely sorry, but I doubt it because we are on break, so i'll work faster to get chapter 11 up! Anyways, enjoy and reviews are appreciated! Thanks! And Merry Christmas!(:

**Chapter 10**

The next morning I woke up in James' arms on his bed. I smiled, loving the feeling of his comfort.

I snuggled up into his chest and listened to his steady heartbeat. The sun was shining through the blinds displaying its rays on the bed sheets.

He shifted in bed and I saw him flutter his eyes open.

"Morning," I said softly tilting my head to look up at him.

I saw him smile and look down to me.

"Morning Tati," he said.

"How do you feel?"

"Awful."

"Shouldn't have drank," I told him.

He laughed softly.

"It was my birthday."

I reached up and kissed him on the cheek. "It's okay," I said.

"I have a hangover," James mumbled looking to the ceiling.

"I know," I said.

"I feel like shit," he said.

I laughed while saying, "Do you want breakfast?"

"No. I want to stay here," he said.

"But I'm hungry. I gotta go eat," I said siting up.

He gave me a pouty look before he said, "I guess."

We both threw the covers and got out of bed.

I took a look in the mirror. My straight hair was puffy and wavy. I looked like a mess. My make up was dried out and faded away. My dress, I had to pull it down just a bit because it had risen while I was sleeping.

James came to stand behind me and hugged my waist placing his chin on my shoulder.

"Aw why'd you do that," he teased.

I smiled looking at him through the mirror and shook my head.

"You're gross."

"Hey, I'm a guy. We're pretty gross," he countered.

I laughed as I leaned into him feeling his warmth. I could stay in this position forever.

This wouldn't be the first time he did this. I remembered he used to do this all the time when growing up in New York.  
Only now I know that when he did that, he had a crush on me.

It was during the winter when I was twelve and he thirteen. We were walking around the busy and packed New York City when James, who always comes up with brilliant ideas, decides to go up the Empire State Building.

"Tati, lets go," he said taking my hand and dragging me through the doors.

I pulled back and jerked my hand out of his grip. He turned around to face me.

"Come on," he pleaded.

"James. I don't have money and look—" I pointed at the massive line behind him—"The line is way too long. I'm not wasting my time," I said.

I hated long lines. They just annoyed me so much and that's why I always avoided long lines as much as I could.

I realized that what I had said wasn't a kind way of saying that I didn't want to go up there. It sounded like I didn't want to hang out with James at all.

"Wow. So you don't want to be here with me?"

"No that's not what I meant."

He smiled and luckily, we understood each other well to know that he was just joking around with me. Therefore, he wasn't offended at all. He knew I loved him in a brotherly way.

"Tati. I have money and the line won't take long when you're with me," he said taking hold of my hand again.

I pondered a bit and stood in front of him contemplating whether I should give on or not.

"Fine," I finally said.

He was right. The time flew by and besides the line being long, it didn't seem like it took forever. It went by pretty fast with James cracking up jokes and sharing stories from school.

Before I knew it, we were up on the terrace of the Empire State Building.

We walked out of the elevator and headed over to the edge to look out to the rest of New York.

The building with the office lights illuminated the dark evening and Christmas lights immediately turned on down below.

It was colder up here because we were standing at a high point. The wind was blowing and I had to tug onto my scarf from flying away. I zipped up my jacket and tucked the scarf in there.

I shivered a bit and looked over to James who was fascinated by the extraordinary view. Well, it was priceless if you asked me. New York at night was the prettiest view anyone could ever see because of the city lights shining bright in the dark.

I loved hanging out with him. It meant doing anything we wanted because our parents trusted us. And it's not like we were going to do anything bad. Well maybe James would because he parties a lot, but me; I'm a sweet innocent girl.

I kept looking out to the city with out any of us saying anything to each other. We were enjoying each other's presence when suddenly a pair of big arms wrapped around me and hugged me in a sweet embrace.

At first, I was about to scream and strangle myself out of this person's grip, but I realized it was James because he wasn't next to me anymore. That calmed me down.

I smiled and loved being in his arms because first, I was cold and he was warming me up. And second, I knew he would protect me from any danger. He was like a big brother to me.

He hugged me tightly and I closed my eyes taking him in. He placed his head on my shoulder, which made me giggle.

"I knew you were cold," he whispered.

"Thanks pal," I said.

We stayed up there for another ten minutes before we decided it was freezing and too windy to stay there. My eyes were getting watery just looking out to the city. We went back down and exited the building.

It was just like this moment I was having with him right now, with his arms around me. Personally, I loved when he did that.

"Ugh my head is throbbing," he complained.

"Mine isn't," I said smiling at him.

He gave my waist a pinch and I jumped.

"James!" I squealed.

"Tati!" He mocked.

I turned around to face him. He was smiling as gave me a quick kiss on the lips.

"What do you want to eat?" I asked.

"I don't even think there's food."

"There has to be eggs."

He shrugged his shoulders.

"Do you like not, eat here?"

"I don't really know how to cook so I order food a lot. Occasionally I'll whip up something in the kitchen, but it's rare to find me cooking," he said.

"You're so lazy."

"Not really!" He said sounding offended.

"Whatever. I'll go see what's in the kitchen." I said walking away.

I walked downstairs to the kitchen.

The place looked like a mess. I know what we were going to do today. Clean the house.

I heard James coming down the stairs.

"James this place is a mess."

"I'll call house cleaning," he said. He was standing in front of me now.

"No. Why would you-" I began.

He placed his hands on my shoulder in a way to tell me to calm down.

"It's okay. I do this all the time," he said looking into my eyes.

I got butterflies in my stomach just being so close to him and having his hands on me.

"Right because you're lazy," I teased.

"Maybe, but not for this."

"Not for—" I was cut off when his lips met mine. I felt a spark between us just like the first time we kissed.

I placed my hands behind his neck and kissed him back passionately.

He picked me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist as he took me over to the couch.

He sat down still holding onto me. I straddled his lap as I got on top of him.

He was getting forceful by the second, kissing me harder.

His hands were still on my waist going lower, placing them on my hips. They were slowly creeping up under my dress touching my bare skin.

I felt a rush run through my body, which made me feel oozy.

He kissed my neck, which surprisingly felt good. I felt like I was in another world.

My hands were on his chest and going lower. I removed his shirt and he unzipped my dress. His hands were exploring my body as was mine. The dress fell to my waist.

I felt his smooth hands on my back fondling with the clip of my bra.

"Can I?" he asked.

I nodded.

He took off my bra as we kept kissing each other harder and sloppier. Our tongues were intertwined with each other's getting forceful by the second, battling each other trying to establish who was stronger.

I knew this was a competition, and this time I wasn't going to let him win. I softly bit on his lower lip, which I knew he enjoyed. His hands slowly moved down and down, before we heard someone coming down the stairs.

"Shit," he muttered under his breath, his lips still centimeters away from mine.

"Guess we'll have to continue later," I said getting off.

I quickly put my bra on again and pulled my dress up.

James just sat watching me.

"Aren't you going to put your shirt on?" I asked.

He shrugged his shoulders and smiled.

Just then his dad appeared in his work suit.

"Good morning," I said.

"Oh Tati! Hey!" He said waving at me.

I couldn't believe he was going to work the day after an intense party. It was ridiculous, but if the man had to work, who am I to stop him. I guess they called him in.

"Morning dad," James said.

"It's um three in the afternoon. How about good afternoon?" James dad joked.

James laughed before saying, "Alright. Good afternoon."

"There we go and how's the birthday boy?"

"Splendid," James said, his eyes never leaving me.

I smiled.

"Good good," his dad said walking into the kitchen.

I heard cups clattering in the kitchen and the sound of opening bags and refrigerators and the oven beeping.

"That was close," James whispered.

"I know." I mouthed.

We both just stayed there awkwardly listening to the movement of his dad in the kitchen.

We heard the microwave turn on and then beep signaling it was done warming up whatever he was going to eat.

It took him at least ten minutes to finish with the final product.

James and I simply looked at each other, no movement, and no nothing. Not until he left.

"Okay, well, I have to go to work. They just called me in," His dad finally said. It seemed like forever until he said it.

"Alright have fun." James said.

"Bye guys," he said walking out with a container filled with what seemed like canned chicken noodle soup, and a briefcase in the other.

I sat down on the couch next to James. He placed his hand on my leg, which made me get butterflies again.

I smiled as I looked at him.

He moved in and kissed me again, but not for long.

"I love you," he whispered softly.

I kissed him again.

"I love you too." I said.

This time, he pulled me closer and kissed me again. He leaned in more pushing me down on the couch. He was lying on top of me, kissing me. But then stopped.

"Scoot," he said.

I scooted to the edge of the couch.

He squeezed in between the cushion and me and wrapped his arm around me securing me in a tight grip.

He kissed my cheek in a genuine way of saying, goodnight.

"Are you seriously going to sleep?" I asked.

"Mhm."

"No, I came down here to get something to eat," I complained.

"Go get something to eat. I'm going to sleep," he mumbled closing his eyes.

"Alright," I said getting up. "But you might want to put your shirt back on."

He laughed as he grabbed his shirt and put it back on before he fell back down to sleep.

I walked upstairs to get my phone and quickly came back down.

I texted Megan.

_Hey._

_Hey! I haven't heard from you in like days. What's up?_

_Nothing. Just waking up from a party._

_Ooh who's?_

_James._

_Awesome. How was it?_

_It was good. We're dating._

_You are! Omg! I'm so happy for you. Wait, what about Daniel?_

_I don't know, to hell with that kid._

_He hasn't been around here..._

_He hasn't gone back to New York?_

_Nope. At least I haven't seen him around. I don't think any one has. What if he's still in Cali?_

_I don't know. I hope not. He's a dick. _

_Yeah I guess he is since he cheated on you._

_I'd rather not talk about it. How are you and Jerry?_

_We're good. I'm at his house right now. _

_Doing what?_

_Stuff._

_What kind of stuff?_

_Just stuff lol._

_Lol okay fine._

I put my phone down and opened the refrigerator to find absolutely nothing. James was right.

I sighed and opened up the cabinets and found some chips here and there and cans. I didn't feel like eating canned food, so I grabbed the Doritos bag and began eating it.

I walked back to the couch and sat down on the burgundy carpet.

What if Daniel was still here in California? Shit. That's like a nightmare.

I rolled my eyes in annoyance and stuffed my mouth with chips.

I really hope he isn't here because of me. He just needs to go. I'm so stupid to date a douche like him. I regret it.

If James still lived with me back in New York, he would've helped me date the right people instead of dicks like Daniel. But then again, that's how everyone learns to not make the same mistakes again.

I felt James place his hand on my shoulder.

"Can I have some?" He asked.

I handed him the bag with out turning to look at him.

I heard him stuff some in his mouth before I felt his arm dangling at the end of the couch, falling onto my shoulder.

"What's wrong Tator Tats?" He asked.

He could always tell when something bothered me. Sometimes, it was good, other times like this, it was annoying because I didn't want him to know.

"Nothing," I said a little too quickly, which I regretted because now he knew something was really wrong.

"Don't lie," he said.

I sighed.

"It's not- it's nothing. It doesn't matter. Don't worry."

"Tati, come on. I'm your best friend. You can tell me."

"No. Nothing. James, I'm fine," I lied. But I was worried about Daniel. Why couldn't he just leave already? Why did he have to stay in California?

James kissed the top of my head.

"You can tell me when you're ready," he said taking some more chips.

I sighed in relief that he wouldn't bug me about it.

Maybe I should tell him. Or maybe I shouldn't. I don't know. I don't want to keep it a total secret because he is my best friend slash boyfriend.

I took out my phone and texted Megan back.

_Should I tell him?_

_Tell who? And what?_

_Tell James about Daniel._

_It would be the right thing to do._

_But everything is going fine right now I don't want to ruin it._

_He's your best friend. If he's not your boyfriend, then he's your best friend, besides me of course. And he'll always be there. Just tell him. He's not going to get mad._

_I don't know. I don't want him to worry._

_You'll regret it if you don't._

I ignored her last text finding it too hard to continue talking about the situation.

"Do you want to come to LA to me to run some errands?" James asked.

"Sure," I said.

I quickly stood up and hovered James who was still lying comfortably on the couch.

He pulled me down and gave me a kiss.

"Lets go," he said.

"One thing. I don't have any clothes," I told him.

"What about the ones from yesterday?"

"Your genius mind thought it'd be cool to swim in the lake," I said as he began to laugh, "And now I don't have any clothes."

He couldn't stop laughing for the longest time. I stood watching him with my arms crossed.

"We can stop by my parents house," he said grabbing the keys of the key holder.

We drove to his parent's house and walked in. I went straight to my room.

I changed into shorts and a pink halter-top and put my hair into a messy bun. I walked into the bathroom to wipe away the smeared and faded away make up off my face.

Personally, I don't like to wear a lot of make up because I like my original look.

When I was done, I walked into James room. He was walking around his room. Shirtless. I was shocked, in a good way.

I walked over to his bed and sat down playing with my fingers.

"Oh, hey Tati," he said pulling out a yellow shirt.

"Hey," I said.

He walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind him leaving me with just time to think about myself.

I seriously did not want to consider what Megan was saying about Daniel. If he's still in California... I let my thought trail off not wanting to think about the possibilities.

I sighed. What if I ran into him? No, stop being so pessimistic, I told myself.

I hadn't noticed James had came out the bathroom until he dove onto the bed wrapping his arms around me and pulling me down with him.

I laughed as he kept one hand under me and his other wrapped around my stomach.

We were both face-to-face smiling.

He appeared to be thinking something on his own as he gently pulled a loose strand of my hair away from my face.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked staring into his lovely hazel eyes.

"How lucky I am to have you back in my life again. And how beautiful you've grown to be."

"You've grown to be handsome," I said.

He gave me a peck on the lips and smiled.

"What errands did you need to run?"

"I need to drop off the envelope Kendall gave to me to my manager and then pick up a script for a new show I'm going to be on."

"Oh! When do you start filming?" I asked.

"In like a week," he said.

Two weeks prior to my departure.

I didn't want to think about the day I would leave. Why all of a sudden, there are complications?

I nodded, "So lets get going then."

We both got off the bed and walked outside to his car.

We got in and he drove downtown rolling the windows down and blasting dub step from his iPod.

I loved this type of music so I didn't have a problem with it. I loved to jam out to these types of songs.

When we got there, we got out of the car.

He held my hand as we walked up to the shopping center.

"So I think I'm going to be long. You go along and shop or eat since I know you're hungry."

"Okay, see you later then," I said turning away from him.

"Tati," he called out.

I turned around to face him and find him holding out some money in his hands.

"You're forgetting this," he said.

I walked closer to him and took the money.

"Thanks," I said shoving it in my pocket.

He started to turn away, but I grabbed his shirt and pulled him in. I kissed him on the lips with his hands on my waist.

We kissed for a long time before I said, "And you were forgetting that."

He smiled and kissed me again.

"You should go," I said pulling away.

He nodded and flashed me a smile. I giggled and we both went our separate ways.

I walked down the streets of LA amused by the up beat style it had such as signs with different font and color that attracted my eyes. One especially did. A petite clothing boutique that caught my attention.

I walked in and found the cutest clothes ever. From blouses to skirts to dresses to sweaters to anything a girl could ask for.

I felt like I was in heaven.

I reached in my pocket to count how much money James gave me.

He literally gave me a hundred dollar bill.

Where the hell did he get all this money, I asked myself before I remembered he's a celebrity.

I began to look around for anything I would like to buy.

I ended up buying a beige blouse with some light denim jean shorts and some jewelry.

I had used up about $80 by the time I purchased all my items.

I had carried my stuff and figured that I was starving.

But shopping for me takes away the hunger. Only temporarily though.

I didn't realize how hungry I was until I heard my stomach growl when I passed by McDonalds.

I decided to walk in there to order the ten piece chicken nuggets with French fries and a drink.

I decided to get that for James too since we both love that meal and he's probably just as hungry as I am.

I ordered to go.

When they handed me the food I filled up our drinks and grabbed my bags. I opened the door when I hit someone hard.

I heard him grunt and my drinks fell to the floor.

Great. Now I have to refill them, I thought in my head.

"I'm so sorry," the man said picking up my stuff.

I recognized that voice, almost as if I heard it way too much.

The name was on the tip of my tongue. I was struggling to figure out who it was and suddenly I couldn't stand straight because just then, he looked up.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

"D-Daniel?" I stuttered.

I hoped I was dreaming, that none of this was real. That none of Daniel being in front of me was actually happening, but I knew better.

"Oh hey Tati," he smiled handing me the cups back.

I felt like punching the smile off his face. I felt like hurting him for being here, but I'm not like that.

"What are you doing here?" We both asked at the same time, which annoyed me.

He smiled like it was cute, but it wasn't. Nothing of this was cute or special at all.

"How are you?" Daniel asked.

"Does that even concern you?" I asked.

"Really Tati? Since when have you become so feisty?"

"Since you cheated on me." I said with out missing a beat.

I saw him roll his eyes like that were the dumbest thing I ever said.

"What are you doing here?" I questioned.

"I thought I'd stay here. LA is _gorgeous_," he said dragging out the last word.

"Why are you here?" I repeated myself raising my voice.

He gave me an unrelenting look before saying, "Because I knew I'd run into you sooner or later."

This grossed me out. He was waiting for me, what a dork. Did he possibly think I would take him back? Because the answer is no.

"Like I said Tati. I would make you mine again. What can I do to let you see that I'm the guy? All I ask for is a second chance."

"I don't give second chances. That's bull. Especially to people like you. Why don't you have sex with Mary? I'm sure she'll give you a second chance," I said with pure disgust in my voice.

"No. I don't want her. I want you."

"Too bad. I'm busy and I just want you gone. Don't waste your time."

"But I'm not wasting my time. I'm talking to you aren't I?"

I hated how he was acting. It made me sick. He was acting like what he did to me was nothing. But it was something. He's acting like he doesn't care, which pissed me off. Stupid asshole. I wanted to slap him to make him wake up. Make him realize that I'm never going back to a jerk like him.

"You are. But do I want to stay and chat with you? Hm, I don't think so," I said walking back inside to refill the drinks.

He pulled me back by placing his arms around my waist.

I turned around and gave him a dirty look. "Get your hands off me," I demanded.

"Depends. Do I want to? Hm, I don't think so," he sneered.

I pushed his hands off me and walked back inside to refill the drinks.

"You know, word on the street is you have a new boyfriend," he said from behind.

Why was he following me, I asked myself.

I rolled my eyes.

"Oh really?" I said in the most un-amused tone ever.

"Yeah. You're all over the magazines with that prick Jim?" he said.

"His name is James," I whirled on him. "And he's not a prick."

"Whatever," he said with a wave of his hand.

"You know, you really need to grow up and go back to New York and accept the fact that you ruined a relationship that you couldn't fix," I said.

"Whoa, no need to get salty with me," I said.

He was trying to turn everything into a joke, but it wasn't. Why is he so stupid?

"I'm not getting salty. I'm just stating the facts," I said raising my voice.

I grabbed the cups and bags and walked out of McDonalds. I took my phone out and texted James to meet me at McDonalds.

Within seconds he responded with an _'okay see you there baby(:'_

I smiled, but then I remembered Daniel was here. My smile wiped away and I stared to the ground.

"Tati, can we please just talk things over?" He asked.

I looked up and shook my head. I kept my eyes straight on the building in front of me as I leaned against the window panel of Mickey D's.

"Come on Tatiana."

"Daniel! Just leave me alone! I don't like you! Go away. Go back to New York. Forget about me. What we had is history and you just need to cope with out me, okay?" I snapped.

"No because I can't do that," he said placing his hand on the window right above my shoulder, hovering over me.

I wanted to escape, to run away from all of this, but James was coming. I wanted to be in James' arms right now, but here Daniel was trying to play moves on me.

I wasn't sure what his intentions were and I was afraid he might do something. Something I would regret.

**James Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

McDonalds sounds good for lunch. Or dinner. Or both. I guess it's just a snack.

I dropped the envelope at my manager's office and picked up the script at Paramount Studios.

I started looking over the script while on my way to McDonalds.

In this show called "See Dad Run", I would be playing a bad boy named Ricky Adams. I started practicing my lines and going over them in my head like I always did.

I was getting closer to McDonalds happy to see my girl in her shorts and cute shirt. I smiled at the thought that she was finally mine. Good job James, I thought, hard work pays off.

I walked down the sidewalk all perked up smiling at everyone I saw, when suddenly that all changed.

My smile disappeared. My shoulders dropped. My face went dead serious because I saw Tati talking with another guy.

Normally, I wouldn't care. She can talk to who ever she wants; I won't get jealous. I'm not the type who will keep their girlfriends from talking to any other guy, but it bothered me because I recognized that guy from somewhere.

I was puzzled and frozen as I tried to see who the guy was. I knew I had seen him from somewhere, but I couldn't think for some reason because this guy was putting his hands on her.

This was certainly not okay. I was getting jealous by the second. I felt like a volcano just ready to erupt.

I started walking faster towards them ready to beat the shit out of this guy.

Tati hadn't even seen me walking to her, but I bet she would've if they hadn't started kissing.

This broke me. This shattered me. I nearly dropped my scripts. I stopped dead in my tracks unable to move.

My mind was swarmed with all these questions like, was she cheating on me? Who is this guy?

And then I saw him more clearly.

It was Daniel.

So was Tati playing me? Was she doing this all along? Did she really break up with Daniel or was that a lie? Why was she doing this?

I walked over to them and I cleared my throat. Daniel let go of Tati and slowly backed away. I couldn't look at neither of them. Actually I could look at Daniel, but not at Tati.

I could feel her eyes on me like a hawk, but I restricted myself from looking at her.

"Hello," Daniel said holding out his hand.

"Hey," I said shaking his hand.

As much as I didn't want to, I still did it.

What a joke. I feel played. I feel like a dumb loser wasting my time.

"James I got you lunch," Tati said.

How was I supposed to react to this entire situation now? I didn't want to create a scene in the middle of the streets. Paparazzi might show up and start snapping pictures. I didn't want that. But hell, paparazzi might as well have already taken pictures of Tati kissing some other dude.

I can already see the headline, _"James' girlfriend caught cheating!"_ That's just what I would need to top off this day.

I could fake it. Act like I didn't see anything. I myself am an actor. I think I'm just going to do that. I'll see how long it takes for her to tell me what really happened.

"Oh thanks!" I said flashing her a fake smile.

She smiled back slimly and I looked away.

"Did you get your scripts?" she asked.

"Yeah I was going over them just before I got here," I said.

"Awesome. Um are we going home now?" she asked timidly.

I nodded.

She didn't even say bye to Daniel. She just picked up her stuff and started walking.

"Nice to meet you. It's a shame she couldn't introduce you to me," I said to Daniel making sure Tati heard me.

"Oh my name is Daniel," he said.

I glanced over to Tati and found her upset face. I could tell she felt screwed. Her face said it all, but I wasn't going to say anything to her until she decides to tell me.

"Cool, I'm James. Love to stay and chat, but I gotta get going, so see ya," I said walking away with Tati on my right side.

"Alright, bye James. Bye Tati," he said before turning away.

Tati didn't do anything. She ignored him.

It was pretty awkward walking with her. We weren't holding hands. We weren't looking at each other.

And when things couldn't get more awkward, it can.

A girl came up to me. She looked about fifteen.

"Oh my gosh! You're James Maslow right?" she asked.

"Yeah. I'm he," I told her with a smile on my face.

She screamed and I laughed.

"Can I please have your autograph?" she begged.

"Yeah," I said.

Tati was standing next to us just watching with no emotion in her face. She looked like she wanted to go home.

The girl handed me her notebook and a pen.

I signed it and wrote a little message for her.

"Who is that?" she asked in a low voice pointing to Tati.

"Oh… um..." Now what am I going to say? Friend, girlfriend? I don't know. "She's a friend," I finally said.

But then I realized, wrong choice of words.

Tati looked over at me, but quickly looked away. Now she probably thinks I didn't want to be with her, but I did.

"Oh can I have a picture?" the girl asked.

I nodded.

She took the picture and then gave me a tight hug.

"It was nice meeting you!" she said before walking away.

I waved goodbye before Tati and I headed to the car.

We walked in silence. I didn't say anything to her and I could tell, neither did she.

Either way, I was still too disinclined to talk to her. I couldn't confront her of what I saw with out blowing up and causing a fight. I didn't want that.

I wanted to solve this out like civilized people do, calmly and with a purpose.

We drove in silence as I munched on the fries and chicken nuggets.

When we reached the house, I pulled up at the curb. I didn't exactly enter the driveway.

"I have to go somewhere," I said.

Earlier I had gotten a text from my mom that no one is in my house and everyone is back at hers. She also mentioned that everything was clean which made me relieved. It saved me from calling house cleaning.

"Oh all right," she said reaching up to give me a kiss on the lips.

I hardly kissed her back and I think she noticed because when she backed away, she had a very gloomy look on her face.

She got out the car with her stuff and walked through the golden gates to my parent's house.

I put the car on drive and drove off to where ever to clear my mind. I blasted the car with music and just drove.

I was beyond pissed. I felt like I was going to explode anytime soon. I needed to talk to someone.

I called up the guys to meet at Logan's house.

When I got there, they were already there. I walked into the house and threw the doors open.

They were playing their video games.

"Whoa, hey James" Carlos said, his eyes never leaving the TV.

They were playing COD.

"Shit Kendall, why'd you shoot me?" Logan asked. "Oh hey," he then said to me.

"Hey James," Kendall said laughing.

Logan was still starring at me. He paused the game and all the attention was on me.

"What's up?" Kendall asked.

"Nothing," I said walking over to the couch.

They gave me a look that said they knew I was lying. I guess they noticed the bothered look on my face.

I sighed loudly and plopped down on the couch.

"I saw Tati kissing someone else," I said softly looking at the unique patterns of the carpet on the ground.

"What?" Kendall said sounding like he didn't believe it.

"Yeah, she was kissing her ex and—" I began.

"Whoa that douche is still here?" Kendall asked in disbelief.

"Yeah," I said.

Kendall rolled his eyes and threw his controller on the couch. He shook his head.

He's not the only one who's upset, I thought.

"And she hasn't said anything about him or anything that happened to me. She's keeping quiet and I don't know what I should do. I love her. I don't want to lose her but I also don't want a relationship without trust," I finished explaining.

"I say you should talk about it with her. Like mention it, but don't say it in a crappy mood either. Like don't let her know you're upset at her," Carlos suggested.

"I don't know. I was kind of waiting for her to tell me," I said.

"Well you're also not confronting her about it," Logan said. "If you want her to tell you then you need to talk to her about it. If it's really bugging you and you want to know the truth, then ask her about it. Don't keep quiet yourself. You're just hurting yourself as well."

"Yeah because you want to know the truth as well right?" Kendall pointed out.

I shook my head unsure what I should do. They had good points. Maybe I should ask her about him and what happened. What if I'm misunderstanding everything and jumping to conclusions? I don't know. I'd have to ask her.

"Thanks guys," I said.

"No problem," they all said in unison before Logan un-paused the game and continued playing.

I grabbed the other controller and when their match was over, they added me and I played with them well into the night. We ate pizza and I drank a few beers before I decided to head back home.

Maybe not a few beers, more like ten beers. Hey, it still is my birthday week. What the hell? My mind was foggy and I could barely think straight. All I remembered was Tati and Daniel kissing. That scene was glued to my mind and it got me upset.

I checked my phone and had no texts or calls.

Whatever. I didn't care.

I drove back home. Thankfully there were no police around because I know I didn't drive well.

I got home and went straight to my room ready to just crash on my bed and forget this day ever existed, but as soon as I opened the door, I found Tati lying in my bed staring at the ceiling.

My heart skipped a beat and I felt like lying next to her and holding her in my arms, but then anger just rose within me.

She heard me open the door and immediately stood up.

"Where were you?" she asked worried.

"Out," I said sloppily reaching down to the charger to charge my phone.

"Where?"

"None of your business." I mumbled with a roll of my eyes.

"James," she began but I cut her off.

"Why don't you tell me why you were kissing Daniel and didn't say anything?" I blurted.

Her face went blank, like she didn't know what to possibly say to that.

I stood there wobbly and rolled my eyes again. "You don't want to tell me do you," I said. "Well you don't need to because I saw everything."

"James I can explain everything, just give me the chance too," she pleaded walking up to me.

"Was that your way of cheating on me?" I asked.

We were face to face and I couldn't look at her.

"I would never."

"But you did!" I yelled again.

"James no! You know me better! You know me better than to not do that! You know I wouldn't do that in the world, especially to you. I'm not that type of person. I wouldn't hurt you," she yelled pounding on my chest.

I looked everywhere but at her. I couldn't listen to her and process what she was saying. Not right now at least while I was drunk.

Why were we fighting? Why was I so drunk to act this stupid?

I need to stop yelling at her, but I don't know why I can't. I guess I'm just still so pissed about what happened earlier.

Every time I see her, I see Daniel kissing her.

"Don't be mad at me James," she said with her hands placed on my chest.

"Out. Get out of my room," I said finally having enough.

I just needed time to myself.

"I didn't finish explaining," she said tears falling down her face.

I almost felt bad. Almost. But I didn't. I was still infuriated.

I grabbed her arm violently and dragged her out of my room.

What was I doing, I asked myself. I never yelled at Tati. I never grabbed her so forcefully either. I never even laid a finger on her, but I was out of control this time.

"I don't want to hear your shit!" I said pushing her out.

She was standing outside of my room with tears falling down her face and clutching the very spot I had grabbed her.

"J-James," she tried again wiping the streaming tears away.

"Shut up," I said slamming the door in her face.

I heard her crying outside.

I was too mad to think correctly.

"James please let me in," she begged from outside shaking the doorknob.

"Leave! Go back to New York! I don't want you here. You followed what every New York bitch would ever do; cheat. Your boyfriend taught you well didn't he?" I said. "You played me like a fool! Just go!" I yelled banging on the door not caring if my parents or hers heard us. "Go!" I yelled once more.

I heard her run to her room and close her door.

Clearly I wasn't doing what the guys told me to do. I completely ruined it. It probably wasn't a big deal, but I was drunk, somehow I couldn't think. Normally, people would say she ruined it, but I would say I ruined it.

I was out of control. I threw the pillows off my bed and grabbed the sheets. I threw them forcefully at the wall. My room was becoming a mess with all my clothes hanging out of the drawers and colognes and hair products all over the floor.

I myself was a mess. I was beyond angry.

I was losing the one girl I loved my entire life. I didn't even give her the chance to explain. I just blurted all my feelings out. Big mistake.

I felt like shit for treating her so terribly. She probably hates me now. I screwed everything up.

**Tati's Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

I can't believe James said all those words to me. It hurt me. He didn't even give me a chance to explain anything to him. He just blurted out all his feelings.

Maybe he's right. Maybe I should just go. I complicated his life. We should've never stopped dating in the first place. And to think, that all started yesterday.

Why did Daniel ruin everything? Why did he kiss me? Why did he make moves on me when I clearly told him to get off me?

I guess from James' point of view, it looked differently. But I loved James; I would never cheat on him. He should know that.

I rubbed the spot on my arm were he dug his fingers into. It hurt a lot and I whimpered in pain.

I cried out all the pain I was feeling inside. I was heartbroken because James was accusing me of cheating on him. But I didn't.

Earlier, this is what happened. Daniel was getting touchy with me and I told him to stop.

I tried to push him away, but the next thing he did was, grab my face and pull me in. I wanted him to stop, but he was too strong to push away.

When he finally released me, I was in utter shock. And then James was standing there and I knew he saw everything.

He seemed tense by the way he was standing. I wasn't sure if I should tell him or not. He didn't ask, so I would assume I'd bring it up when we were calmer because I knew he wasn't too content at that moment.

When I kissed him in the car, he didn't do anything. Almost like he didn't want me to kiss him. I wouldn't blame him.

He said he was going somewhere and I didn't even ask him where he was going. I was guessing we needed time to ourselves to simply think about everything.

He was drunk tonight, I know it because his breath reeked of beer and his words were slurred. Maybe that's why he lost control.

Everything was a mess.

I lifted up my sleeve to reveal a very red arm with a large bruise forming. I tried touching it, but I could barely handle the pain.

I cried myself to sleep for the second time in California.

The next day I woke up around nine in the morning, another day, but this time with out James.

I combed my hair and brushed my teeth before walking out of my room.

I looked over to James' room and found his door shut. I felt like crying again, but I held it in. I had to be strong on my own now.

I walked downstairs to the kitchen.

"Morning sweetheart!" my dad said.

"Morning," I said forcing a smile.

"Hey mom," I said giving her a hug.

"Morning," I said to James' mom and dad each giving them hugs.

They were all sitting at the table eating bacon and eggs.

I felt lost with out James by my side. He was my puzzle piece. I needed him to feel complete. I was loosing him for the second time.

I grabbed a piece of bacon and chewed on it. It tasted extremely good.

"Hey honey, can you wake James up and tell him to come down stairs please?" his mom asked.

I nodded and headed back upstairs.

What I wanted to do was run away from here and scream. I didn't want to see James.

I dreaded opening his door because it felt weird. We had just fought and I don't even know where we stand. This is probably the first serious fight we have ever had.

When I reached his door, it opened before I could place my hand on the doorknob. He was in jeans and a blue shirt.

I didn't know what to say, whether I should say good morning or begin with an _'I'm sorry'_. I was tongue-tied. So instead, I said what his mom told me to tell him.

"Your mom is looking for you," I mumbled.

I had the urge to just fall into his arms and kiss his soft lips over and over again and never let go. I wanted to hug him and make him see and feel how sorry I am, but I couldn't because he looked at me like I was a stranger.

He had his head tossed back like he didn't care and his eyes were open in irritation of his view.  
I didn't even recognize this side of him.

"What?" he asked looking down at me like I was some worthless piece of trash. He never looked at me that way. It was new, and I hated it.

I cleared my throat, "Your mom is looking for you," I said.

His face revealed no expression so it was hard to figure out what he was thinking.

I took one last look at him before I turned away from him and walked back downstairs.

My heart was beating ten times faster than ever because I knew he was behind me.

We reached the kitchen and everyone was still there. There were two empty chairs next to each other, which made me agitated because I knew he didn't want to be near me at this moment.

I kind of didn't want to be next to him either.

We all ate together as a family, but this time it was different. There was an eerie tension between James and I.

I could tell our parents sensed something because they all got up.

"We're going out," his mom said.

"Okay see you guys later," I said.

They walked out leaving James and I together.

The tension increased greatly with James and I together alone.

My breathing was growing abnormal. I didn't know what to expect. It was like watching PKs of a very intense soccer game. I didn't know what was going to happen next.

I needed to get out of here. This was all too much for me. I needed air.

I pushed my chair back and got up. I walked to the sink and washed my plate and utensils quickly before I walked outside to enjoy the LA morning heat and just let my thoughts roam free.

I left James alone and I didn't care.

I just needed to think.

Questions like, Does this mean that James and I are still together? Or does it mean that we're over? Why had I ruined everything? When were we going to talk again? Where we ever going to be the same?

I stayed outside for a good hour sitting on the deck chair when I decided to go inside. It was way too hot. I found James on the couch with his feet elevated on the coffee table. He was drinking soda.

We both made eye contact, but that was all. I looked away and headed up stairs.

I knew I would just be trapped in this house all day. The parents were out, asking James to take me somewhere meant talking to him and I wasn't ready to do that. So I watched TV in my room and ended up falling asleep.

When I woke up, I could hear our parents moving around downstairs. It was around three in the afternoon.

I got up and walked down stairs. I saw the two dads watching football like always, and then I heard my mom talk.

"I thought they were dating."

And that's how I knew they were talking about James and I.

I stood right outside of the kitchen entrance eaves dropping on their conversation.

"I thought that too, but this morning, they didn't really do anything," James' mom said.

I sighed. If only they knew.

"Right, and I'm not sure, but did you hear yelling last night. I think they might've been fighting," my mom said.

"Yes I heard it. I was going to see what it was all about but I decided not to get into their mess," his mom said.

"True. They're old enough to take care of themselves and fix their problems."

I heard the front door open and I immediately turned around to see James walking in through the front door.

He was carrying grocery bags. Maybe his mom told him to go shopping.

This time, he didn't look at me. Nothing. But he knew I was there, he just forced himself to look straight.

He walked by me as if I wasn't even there. As if I were a ghost. As if I had disappeared into thin air. As if I never existed to him.

He made me feel like I was nothing, like I was worthless, and that hurt me inside. A lot.

"Oh hey James!" my mom said.

"Hey," he said.

I waited five minutes before I walked in the kitchen.

I felt awkward walking in the kitchen because all eyes were on me, minus James'.

I walked to the refrigerator to pull out a juice pouch of Caprison. I threw away the plastic covering of the straw and began to drink it.

"Hey," I said walking over to the table where they were discussing about me.

"Hey sweet heart," James' mom said.

James was sitting on the counter top eating an apple starring into the distance.

If he was going to make me feel invisible, then fine. Two can play this game.

Just then my mother gasped lifting up my sleeve revealing the purple-greenish bruise on my arm.

"What happened?" she asked examining the finger marks.

"Nothing. I was swimming and I banged into the sides. Nothing big," I lied.

I didn't want them to know what happened last night. And I didn't want to give James in.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see James looking at me. He probably knew it was a lie and realized it was him who did it.

"That is a really ugly wound," James' mom said. "James, can you ice her arm?" she then asked.

I got butterflies in my stomach and I could feel myself blushing.

I didn't want to be alone with James. Not right now. It would be weird and awkward.

"Yeah," he said.

He hopped off the counter top and threw his apple away in the trash.

"Come on," he said to me.

I got up and followed him to the garage where the icepack was.

"Where's the bruise?" he asked.

I gave him my arm and he took it gently this time and placed the icepack on it.

I flinched at first because it hurt with the slightest touch.

He looked up quickly and for the first time, he looked like he felt sorry. For what? That, I'm not sure of.

"Sorry," he said.

I wasn't sure whether the apology was for the pain or for the actual bruise itself.

He held it against my arm for ten minutes. Ten minutes of the incessant breathing of our bodies. Ten minutes of being so close to each other but not being able to do anything. Ten minutes of silence and still I felt connected to him somehow.

When he was done, he put everything away. He didn't look back when he walked out.

I sighed and stayed put unsure of what to do.

I closed my eyes and wondered where did everything go wrong? We were once so strong, loving each other. Now I feel distanced from James. Like we were two new people. Or like two strangers who didn't know each other at all.

What happened to being two peas in a pod?

What happened to having each other's back?

What happened to forever?

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

One week later and we haven't talked. We haven't even seen each other.

I decided if James truly loved me, then he would come to me. I wouldn't be wasting my time, moping around, waiting for him.

I hung out with my parents and his parents for the most part that week. We went sightseeing most of the time and we shopped for a lot clothes.

It was all too fun, but everywhere I went, I couldn't help but to remember about James. I couldn't help but to have flashbacks of the good times we had such as the first few days I came here, when we watched the stars in San Fran. Or went to Hollywood. It was exciting, but that's in the past now. I have to live in the present.

James hasn't been around the house anymore. I would assume because of his script and filming and everything.

I heard from his mom that he chose to begin filming this week instead, probably to get his mind off things, me in particular.

I wondered, does he still think of me? Does he love me? Or did he forget about me? Am I a "nobody" in his life?

I sighed and tried to clear my mind from all this hopeful and negative thoughts.

We were slowly drifting away becoming total strangers in each other's lives just like what happened eight years ago. And I didn't like it.

It felt too much of a repeat.


	12. Chapter 12

_**Sorry it has taken me almost two months to post chapter 12, but like always, I'm really busy with school. But I had today off to edit it and stuff because I had it written like about a month ago, just never got to edit and post it, but here it is. Again, I am so sorry for the long wait and I appreciate that you all have been patient. And yes, I have started chapter 13 but it's not done. Hopefully I'll have that done soon but I'm not making any promises just yet. And another reason is, I'm working on other fan fictions (still deciding wether or not I should post it here or not) as well so I jump back and forth on the stories, but here is chapter 12! Oh And don't think I have forgotten about the story either. I'm always thinking about new ideas to keep the story going. Well thanks again and sorry, for about the third time. But yeah! enjoy!(:**_

**Chapter 12**

**James Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

This past week I have spent at my job, filming the episode that I was going to appear on. That means that I'm recording deep into the night. Sometimes I'd leave around eight in the morning the next day and come back to film around three in the afternoon just to work for six hours. The recording for one episode was always hectic.

As far as seeing my parents, I don't. I only see my cast mates from the show. I haven't even seen the guys either. I haven't spoken to them, but I'll be hanging with them next week when we'll be recording some new songs we've written.

They don't know about Tati and I either. I meant to tell them when it happened, but I didn't find time to. Half the time, I was learning my new lines and the other half I caught myself thinking about Tati.

The situation I put both of us in is starting to tick me off. I want to see her again, but I don't know if she feels the same way. She probably still hates my guts and what I did to her.

I've always been the kind of guy who would protect her from anything but there I was causing her harm. I feel so ashamed of myself. I never hurt any of my girlfriends, and then I hurt Tati. I felt like a douche. I probably am.

Today is Saturday and filming ended yesterday. I'm so glad to be sleeping in. I haven't slept for a good eight hours since last week. I treasure sleep.

I'm in my house down in San Diego because I didn't feel like it was a good idea to stay in the same house at Tati.

Why would I stay in a house with my ex girlfriend doing nothing. Most of the time, the only thing I'd be doing is leaving the house going somewhere to not be in the house. So to save me from that, I decided in staying at my place, just me enjoying the peace and quiet.

Well that was until I heard something or someone moving downstairs. I quickly got out of bed and peered out the doorway of my room.

Someone was down there in the kitchen.

I crept down the stairs quietly and moved towards the kitchen.

"Do you think he's awake?" A man said.

"I don't know," A girl said.

Who were these people?

I grabbed a vase from one of the coffee tables and moved closer to the kitchen ready to attack them.

"Lets go check," the guy said.

I jumped in the kitchen and the girl screamed. The guy was startled and stumbled backwards.

I noticed them. I knew who they were. It was my brother and sister. Ali and Philip.

"Guys! Don't scare me like that!" I yelled placing the vase down.

"Dude, you scared the crap out of me!" Ali said.

"I'm sorry," I said.

They each took a seat at the table and I joined them.

"Why are you guys here?"

"Do you want us to go?" my brother asked.

"No, it's just. It's random," I told them.

"We talked to mom last night," Philip said.

"Yeah of?"

"What happened between you and Tati." Ali said.

"How did you guys—"

"Mom told us because she," —he pointed to Ali— "asked about you guys and then she told us what happened." Philip explained.

I looked out to the window and sighed.

"We're not together," I mumbled.

"Why?"

I looked up at them.

"I haven't talked to her to get the full story but this is what happened. I saw her kissing her ex boyfriend; don't ask why he's here. It's a long story. So I got upset and got drunk and when I got back home, I blew up on her. I didn't let her explain anything. And we broke up," I explained.

They stayed quiet as they looked at me.

"The next day, we didn't talk and we haven't since that day. I don't know anything about her."

"Wow," they both said in unison.

"Do you still love her?" Ali asked. "Because when I saw you at your party, you guys looked more than in love."

"Yeah that was not love. That was something that was rushed. And now look at where we are." I explained.

"So what are you going to do now?" Philip asked.

"I don't know. She leaves in two weeks," I said.

"You made her vacation hell," Ali admitted.

"I didn't mean to. I didn't even expect for us to end up together only to result in all of this."

They nodded their heads like they understood what I was going through.

"The question is how are you coping with all of this?" Philip asked.

"Well I mean, I've been keeping myself busy. You know with work and sleep."

"Have you not done something fun in a while?" Ali asked.

"Not since I started filming," I said.

"Well come on. Go change. We're taking you out," Philip said patting my back.

"Where are we going?" I asked getting up

"We were thinking of going surfing maybe," Ali said.

"Yeah that's cool," I said leaving the kitchen to go up to my room.

A nice sunny day to drive up to the beach with my brother and sister to surf sounds like a nice trip. After all, I haven't actually hung out with them in a while. This'll be some sibling bonding time.

**Tatiana's Point of View  
~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

When I woke up it was nine in the morning. I stayed in bed thinking that in two weeks, I'd be leaving. It's been quite boring this past week. Partially because all we do is go to some tour sites and take pictures. But I have no one to talk to.

Usually I'd talk to James, but now that we haven't seen each other or spoken, it's gotten kind of boring.

So what am I still doing here?

I guess it's because I'm still hoping he'll come back to me. I'm still hoping he'll show up anytime soon. I'm still hoping he'll be with me again.

Those hopes keep me from leaving Cali. But it's been a week. Why should I stay here if I have no one to talk to? Why should I stay here if back in New York I have my friends with whom I can have a good time?

I got out of bed and slipped on my slippers.

I don't think we'd be doing anything today. They're probably just staying in bed sleeping in from all that sight seeing.

I walked to the kitchen and sat at the table staring out of the window.

Clearly we were going to be doing something tonight. If it's not in the morning, then it's at night. And it's not like I can say no.

Suddenly, I spotted a note on the refrigerator.

I walked over to it and read it.

Hey Tati. Your mom and I are just running some errands and your dad and my husband are at a game. Just call me when you're awake. I want to tell you our plans for tonight. In case you don't have my number its 562-801-3267.

-Cathy

I sighed and wondered what the plans were going to be for tonight. I grabbed the phone and dialed her number.

"Hello?"

"Hey, it's Tati." I said.

"Oh hey Tati! How are you? Did you have a good night's sleep?"

"Yeah the best, um I read the note you left."

"Right so tonight, actually evening, we're going to go on a dinner cruise. I've been planning on this for a while now. And everyone is going. I reserved it like two weeks ago." She explained.

Actually a cruise didn't sound so bad. It sounded delightful.

"Who's going to go?" I asked.

"Well us, my husband, your dad, James, Ali, Philip, Kendall, Logan, and Carlos."

"Nice," I said trying to sound excited.

Going meant I would be seeing James. I haven't seen him in a week. Talk about awkward.

"Do I need to dress formally?" I asked.

"Just like a nice shirt and a skirt or something. Just look presentable. It's a dinner," she said through the phone.

I laughed. "Okay, I'll go pick put my outfit. What time is it at?"

"It starts at 7:30 and lasts through 10," she said.

"Okay. I'll start getting ready at three."

"Awesome."

"Alright bye!"

I hung up the phone and put it back in its place.

I ran up the stairs to my room and threw myself on the bed. I stared at the ceiling and began to get a flashback of the very first day I got here.

When he showed me around the house. And when he came back from work he patted my hair gently looking into my eyes while I was looking at him through the mirror.

That was our very first moment we had. How magical it felt.

How we had our midnight swim. The dates we'd been on. The picnic at the lake before his party. The night of his party. When he kissed me at the beach, his sweet charming soft lips.

And after that it all went downhill.

I hadn't noticed tears streaming down my face. Those memories were just so special to me. I still can't believe it had to end like this.

It was eleven and I decided to get in the pool. I changed into my bikini and walked outside.

I dove in the blue crystal water and was quickly relieved by its coldness. All my thoughts went away and I felt like I was the only person there. Logically speaking, I was the only one there. But it felt like I had nothing to worry about. Like the water wiped my mind clean and washed away my thoughts.

And that wasn't until I remembered that I would be seeing James again.

I don't know how to react when I see him later.

I hate how I'm going to be the only person there with out anyone to talk to. It's times like these when I wish I had my friends with me. At least I wouldn't be left out.

I continued doing laps around the pool until it was three.

That was when I got out and quickly rushed up the stairs to shower and get ready for tonight.

**James Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

My entire day was spent at the beach surfing with my brother and sister.

I still couldn't believe they were taking time out of their busy schedule to be with me. I mean I understand that we're all very busy and so I like to treasure these moments because they only happen every once in a while.

When we finally had enough of the water, we dried up under the sun on our towels.

Ali went somewhere only to come back with three beer bottles in her hands.

My brother and I smiled.

"Nice cold beer on the beach is like paradise," Ali said handing them to us.

She was right.

Icy cold beer on a hot day at the beach was always relaxing.

"Hey James. Did mom tell you?" Philip asked.

"Tell me what?" I asked taking a sip of my beer.

"About dinner tonight?"

"No. Why? What's happening?"

"We're going on a dinner cruise tonight around seven. The guys are going last time I checked." Philip explained.

"Oh, I had no idea about it, but sounds like fun," I said.

"Yeah it should be especially when the sun is setting," Ali said in a singsong tune.

Philip and I laughed.

"Dude shut up," Philip joked.

"Hey it's a pretty site," Ali countered.

"Yeah yeah. To you, because you're a girl." I teased.

"Don't make yourself believe that you're the big guy," Ali said.

"But I am," I told her.

We all laughed and finished drinking our beer. When we were done. We packed up and got back into the car.

"So James, you know where it is?" Philip asked once we were at my house.

"No."

"It's the one in LA, I'll just send you the directions later when I get home." He said.

"Alright. I'll meet up with you guys later," I said getting out of the car.

I waved bye before I walked in my house to get changed.

My phone vibrated.

_Dress nicely by the way._

It was from Ali.

Awesome. I'd have to be wearing something formal.

I hopped into the shower and let the warmth of the water run down my body.

When I was done, I changed into some black dress pants and a pastel blue top.

I combed my hair and applied some cologne.

When I was done, it was four. Guys don't really take a long time to get ready.

Philip sent me the directions like he said he would.

I called my mom to ask her where we were going to meet up, if it was at her house or at the cruise ship itself.

She told me to go to her house that way we'd only take two cars and not be paying money for parking.

I quickly got in my car and drove to LA. It would take approximately two hours from San Diego to LA.

As I got closer to my parents house, I was getting nervous because I would be seeing Tati again.

I wondered how she was doing. I wondered if she still thought of me. Probably not. She must've been too busy with my parents to even think of me.

I pulled up at my parent's house and waited in the car for a few minutes before I decided to get out.

Just then Logan was arriving with Kendall. They parked next to my car and got out.

"Hey! Haven't seen you in a while!" Logan said giving me a bro hug.

"Yeah you ready for next week?" I asked.

"Hell yeah! Just don't keep yourself away for a week this time," Kendall joked.

We laughed together as we started walking to the door.

"Where is Carlos?" I asked.

"He should be here in maybe ten minutes. He said he was running late," Logan said knocking on the door.

When the door opened I was hoping it was Tati just so that I could see her lovely face again.

But it wasn't. It was my mom.

"Hey Cathy!" Kendall said giving her a hug followed by Logan.

"Hey mom," I said.

"Hey honey," she said.

"We'll be leaving in twenty minutes," she mentioned.

I walked to the family room and sat down on one of the brown leather couches.

"Mom!" I heard a voice call out.

It was most likely Tati's and I tried to hide the smile on my face by looking at my phone. I smiled, because that was typical her. Always calling for her mom.

And also, I had finally heard her voice.

Tati came through the kitchen going to her mom, wearing am aqua blue skater dress and black heels. She looked amazing like she always did.

Logan and Kendall were looking at her and I couldn't help but to stare in awe at her.

"Is this good to wear?" she asked.

"You look beautiful!" her mom exclaimed.

And in truth she did.

"Do I really? Don't feel obligated that you need to say that because I'm your daughter."

"I'm not! You know, if you want a guy's opinion, just ask them," her mom said motioning towards us.

I quickly looked down to my phone before she turned around.

"Them? Who's…" she started but screamed in excitement when she saw them.

I kind of hoped she was screaming for me like very other fan would, but she wasn't.

She ran over to them and gave them hugs.

"Hey!" she said with a big smile.

"Hey Tati," Kendall and Logan said in unison.

And then I realized that they didn't know about us. They, as in Kendall and Logan.

"Do I really look good in this or should I change?" she asked.

"I don't know. Why don't you ask your boyfriend?" Logan teased.

It probably would've been funny if we were still together, but we weren't. So it wasn't.

"Which boyfriend?" Tati asked.

That's when I stepped in.

"We're not… dating." I explained to them.

"Oh right, you." she said motioning her head in my direction.

I was the only one to hear her say that and it sort of hurt because she rolled her eyes slightly afterwards.

Kendall and Logan looked at me confused and I knew I should've told them earlier, but I was extremely busy with everything at work. I didn't have time to text to them and explain everything.

I decided I was going to ignore her actions. I didn't want to start a dispute.

"Um, okay. But if you want my opinion," I started saying to Tati.

"I don't want your opinion." She interrupted me.

"Okay fine," I said rolling my eyes back at her.

And then the doorbell rang and I made my way past Tati to open the front door.

It was Carlos.

"Hey," he said giving me a hug.

"Hey, thought you weren't going to make it." I joked.

"Guys!" I heard my mom yell. "Are you all ready?" she asked from upstairs.

"Yeah, we're all just waiting on you," I yelled back.

When I got to the family room Kendall and Logan were laughing, probably because of some joke they said.

Tati was in the kitchen drinking soda. Her parents and my dad were sitting on the stools waiting for my mom to come.

The doorbell rang again and I was pretty sure it was Philip and Ali.

I knew my mom opened the door because she greeted them in with such excitement.

I was sitting with the guys in the family room talking about the future plans with the band and the songs we're going to record Monday.

"Hey guys!" Philip yelled.

"Hey haven't see you in a while!" Carlos said.

"Yeah where have you guys been all this time?" Kendall asked.

"Working my ass off," Ali said from behind Philip.

We all laughed while everyone greeted each other.

"Typical Ali," I heard Logan say to her as she took a seat next to him.

"Where's Tati?" Ali asked looking over to the kitchen.

Tati got up from the stool in the kitchen and made her way over to the family where we were all waiting for my mom.

Kendall made room for her and she sat next to him.

I didn't look at her, nor did she. But we both knew where we were.

"So Tati, ready for the dinner tonight?" Ali asked reaching over Logan's lap to talk to Tati.

They were always together in the sense of being close buddies. Ever since she came to one of our concerts, they've clicked. They share their own secrets, laugh together about anything, and try to do almost everything together. Well, when they're not busy of course.

It kind of reminded me of Tati and my relationship used to be.

"Yeah, I'm starving." Tati said.

"As soon as my mom comes, we can go. Besides we don't want to be late 'cause if we are, then we're going to miss the boat." Philip said getting in their conversation.

Everyone was talking to each other, but me.

Even Tati was talking, mostly to Kendall though because they were sitting next to each other.

Logan and Ali were talking about God knows what. And Philip and Carlos were talking about something I found no interest in.

I simply blocked everyone out and glued my eyes to my phone not caring about anything.

"Alright! Lets go guys," my mom said at last.

We all got up and I grabbed the car keys. All of us couldn't fit in just one car, so I would be driving with my friends.

"James how many can you fit?" my mom asked.

"Like seven," I said.

"Okay I'll take Tati's parents and her and Ali in my car and you can take your brother and the guys in yours." She suggested.

"Yeah that's cool." I said with a nod.

We all assembled into different cars.

Philip rode next to me and the guys rode in the back.

I blasted some music from the radio and rolled the windows down. I pulled out of the driveway and headed towards our destination.

On the way there, I felt their eyes on me the entire time.

One of them, I'm pretty sure it was Kendall coughed to try to get my attention.

When I stopped at a red light, I looked in the rearview mirror and saw their hawk-like eyes waiting for an explanation. An explanation I should've given earlier. An explanation about what happened between Tati and I.

"Well?" Kendall asked.

I sighed as the light turned green.

"Well, Tati and I broke up," I stated.

"But I thought after you left to go to your house, you'd apologize?" Logan questioned.

"Yeah, it didn't turn out like that." I said. "I lost control. I didn't know what I was doing. I didn't let her explain anything. I sort of jumped to conclusions and it ended terribly. I even gave her a bruise. I noticed it, it's still there, barely though." I added.

"You hurt her?" Carlos asked. "Dude what's wrong with you?"

"It's not like I meant for it to happen, it just did. I was drunk that night and all I wanted was time to myself. But..." I trailed off letting my thought go unfinished because they knew what happened next. I didn't need to repeat it.

"Have you apologized?" Logan asked.

"Yeah when I was icing her bruise the day after, but that was the last thing I said to her before we stopped talking. It's been a week."

"A week?" Logan asked shocked.

I nodded my head.

Philip wasn't saying anything because he already knew the story.

When we got there, we all got out of the car.

Luckily, the boat hadn't left yet. And we barely made it on time.

We all got on the elegant cruise and got escorted to our table of eleven on the second floor.

As I stepped onto the large cruise's red-carpeted floor, jazz music started to play and my ears were filled with instant chatter.

The adults sat towards one end of the table and I on the other.

I had noticed Ali wasn't with us when we sat down and I almost was afraid that she didn't get on the boat.

"Where's Ali?" I asked my mom.

"She's in the bathroom with Tati," she said.

I nodded and took my seat next to Kendall and Carlos. Philip was at the head of the table since we had an odd number, and Logan had two seats empty next to him. Obviously, Ali was going to sit there, and Tati would be sitting next to her and in front of Kendall.

"So what are you going to do about Tati?" Logan asked.

"Nothing," I said.

"But don't you like her?"

"Yeah, but it's not worth it anymore. It's whatever, if she wants to move on then so be it. I don't care. I'm done with all of this." I said.

"Whoa, where did all of this come from?" Philip asked.

"I don't know. I'm just tired of everything. If she's going to treat me like crap, then fine. She's been dead to me this entire week anyway." I said.

I didn't know where all of this anger was coming from. I guess it was just something I needed to get off my chest, something that I have been keeping inside me just ready to explode.

"James you can't say that, you loved her," Kendall said.

"Yeah loved, I don't anymore. I honestly regret everything. Should've just stayed friends. It was better that way. My stupid mistakes." I blurted.

Logan was giving me a look to stop talking, but I didn't catch on just then.

"I don't even care about her anymore. She can go back to New York for all I care." I continued.

"If that's what you want, then fine," I heard her voice say behind me.

Logan shook his head and looked down at the tablecloth.

I knew there was no way to take back anything I just said, but I didn't feel a single drop of guilt as they took their seats in front of us.

We ordered our food and no one spoke afterward.

Almost like all of us were afraid to spark up anything because of Tati and I.

For the most part, I was on my phone checking my Instagram and Twitter.

Tati excused herself from the table and left somewhere, but I didn't see. I didn't care.

The boat was pretty huge. It contained four floors. Then there was the deck to go enjoy the view outdoors. The third floor was the dance area where people could go to dance and the first and second floor were for eating.

So if Tati was leaving somewhere, she better know where she was going because I'm done wasting my time following her.

On my left, I saw Kendall get up from the table and I snapped at him, "Of course. Go be with her. Everyone, just sympathize for her."

"James, stop acting like a douche. You don't realize the people you're hurting. Do you even care?" Kendall said in a strong, firm voice.

"Whatever, coming here was a mistake." I muttered under my breath.

"Stop acting like a four year old. Can you grow up and mature? Seriously. What's wrong with you?" Kendall asked.

"Wrong? She is my problem. I can't handle her anymore. I need her gone from my life. I hate her," I whirled.

"No you don't." Ali slammed her hand on the table, her voice strong and firm.

I noticed people turning around to stare at us and our parents gave us a look to calm down, but I kept my eyes on Ali's small but strong hand still shocked by the slam. "Get a hold of yourself James. I know you're not as cruel as that."

"Yeah well maybe I am." I said.

I rolled my eyes and buried my head into my hands as Kendall walked away.

"By the way, I was just going to go to the bathroom before the food arrives," Kendall said walked away.

I wanted this night to end already.

I was in a bitchy mood to talk to anyone.

"Are you okay?" Carlos asked putting his phone down.

I shook my head.

"I have a headache. I need to get off this boat."

"Or you could just go talk to her." Philip said.

"I don't want to see her. Do you not get it?" I said.

"Just a suggestion and I think it's the smart move," he said taking a sip of his wine.

"I don't want to talk to her. We don't see eye to eye anymore. We never did. And this is how the story ends." I said.

I stared at the white cloth placed on top of the plate in front of me.

"Seriously, just talk to her. Apologize and that's it. You don't need to get back together. Just let her know that you're sorry for what you've done and that's it. Do your part James. If she won't—" Carlos was saying until I cut him off.

"You see that's the problem, I don't let her explain anything because I never let her finish." I said.

"Then this time, don't talk, listen." Logan said.

I exhaled loudly and thought if it was a good or bad idea.

"I hate when you guys are right," I said getting up from the table.

I stuffed my phone in my pocket and headed towards the elevator doors.

Where the hell could she be in this colossal boat?

My first thought was that she'd be in the dance room, but why would she be there? And then it occurred to me that whenever she was upset, she liked to find time to herself. She likes to watch the sunset, so that could only mean she was on the deck of the cruise.

I got in the elevator and it took me to the top floor. As soon as the doors opened, I spotted Tati by herself leaning against the railing staring in the direction where the sun was setting. The sky was orange and pink tonight and the sun was red.

I walked towards her preparing what I was going to tell her.

I didn't even know how to begin, but I knew that I shouldn't be rude like I was a few moments ago.

"Hey." I figured that would be easier to say.

She spun around immediately and almost looked surprised to see me.

"Oh hey," she said in a way telling me that she'd rather be by herself than with me.

"Alright. I'm just going to come out and say it." I said joining her at the rail.

"No don't worry. I get it," she said.

I ignored her, something I had accomplished in the past years. "The things I said to you downstairs, I was just—"

"No need for explanations. I got the message. You're tired of me. So if you—"

"I'm sorry, okay? That's what I needed to tell you."

She looked at me for the longest time with nothing but disappointment.

"You have been my friend since we could talk and that's how you chose to treat me. I guess not everything is, as it seems. People change for the good or for the bad."

'Okay what's that supposed to mean?"

"It means," she snapped, "That I thought you were still the same guy eight years ago, but you've changed. And for the bad too. What? Did fame go to your head or something? I don't think I want someone like you in my life. Not as a friend, nor an acquaintance. Nothing. I guess I'm sorry for even coming and reconciling our past when it was difficult to do with some ignorant jerk like you!" she yelled in my face.

I tried saying something, but she didn't let me.

"But we should just forget everything. I'm pretty sure you have though, and I'm letting go from whatever this shit is."

She walked away from me heading towards the elevators.

"Tati, I apologized." I called out to her.

She turned around. We were ten feet away from each other and neither of us made any move to come closer.

"Fuck you."

She disappeared through the elevator doors and was gone.

What had I done? Why was I stupid?

I'm starting to ask myself the same question day after day because I honestly don't know.

I don't know what to tell her. I can't get her to change her mind.

Maybe I should just accept the fact that it's my fault and I lost her because of my own stupidity.

This time I had let her talk. I didn't try to interrupt her. Nothing.

But that talk was all it took for us to finally go our own way.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Hey! It's been a while since I posted. I know, and I'm deeply sorry for that. I think I had the longest writers block ever because while I was writing this chapter, I always didn't like it and ended up changing it. So I finally came up with this being chapter 13. And I think I am finally content with this one. Hopefully you guys enjoy it as well. And I hope to be updating more often considering I am on summer vacation, but nonetheless, I have summer packets to do and soccer try outs and drivers ed. So bare with me, but I hope I won't keep you waiting three to four months for the next chapter. Anyways, enjoy this and hopefully chapter 14 will be up soon. I still have to write it! But I definitely have ideas for upcoming chapters so stay tuned. I'll try to post more often! Oh and on a side note, this chapter is kind of short too, so yeah. Thanks for reading guys, and reviews are much appreciated(:**

**CHAPTER 13**

**Tatiana's Point of View**

**~~~~~~~~O~~~~~~~~**

I was officially done with James. I figured that if he really wanted to know what happened the day the entire mess occurred, then he would ask. But he continued being a jerk.

I pressed the button several times feeling the need to quickly leave from here.

How did this entire vacation turn into a huge mess? Where did we go wrong?

Maybe it's better that I leave California. It'll be good for James and myself. I can't stay here. I know I can't. I'm not having any fun; I'm in a huge dispute with James. I can't take another week or two feeling this way.

The elevator doors finally opened and I stepped in. When I turned around, I found James leaning against the railing on his phone. I stared at him getting the feeling that I should be there standing next to him. The thoughts itself was absurd. I pushed it away trying to focus on one what I was to do next, which was plan my departure, but all I could do was stare at James.

The doors began to close and James looked up to see me. He had the most somber eyes I have ever seen him have my entire life and I felt sorry for everything that ever happened between us.

I couldn't do this anymore. Tonight, I would book a flight leaving tomorrow in the morning, allowing me time to pack.

The elevator began its decent and I sighed. When the elevator reached the floor I was eating on, I got out and walked back to my table where Ali was talking to Logan.

When I sat down, she turned to look at me. Her smile slowly vanished as she saw disappointment written across my face.

"Ali—" I began, but she cut me off.

"You don't have to explain anything. I'm guessing it didn't go too well."

"I'm just done with what ever this is. I can't," I placed my head in my hands because I was frustrated with myself. I couldn't explain this to her or anyone. I couldn't find the words. And the more I tried to discuss the situation, the more upset I got.

I exhaled loudly and Ali placed her hands on my wrists. "Hey," she snapped me out of my frustration. "It's fine. I understand."

"I'm leaving tomorrow in the morning." I blurted

Her eyebrows furrowed in a frown, "What are you talking about?"

"I'm going to leave tomorrow. James and I need space and besides, I can't stay here. This isn't a vacation anymore. You know that."

"It was supposed to be."

I nodded. "But things happen, people change—"

"Whoa," She cut me off again. "I know James might've changed, but his love for you hasn't."

"Really? Then why are we in this mess?" I asked.

Ali didn't say anything. She remained quiet and stared into my eyes.

"That's what I thought," I mumbled soft enough so that she could hear it.

She looked at me like I was right. If James loved me, we wouldn't be caught up in this chaos right now.

The rest of the night, I was quiet. I didn't talk to anyone. There was too much on my mind. I kept replaying scenarios and kept asking myself, "What if" questions like: what if I had told James that I knew Daniel was going to be somewhere. What if I had explained myself in the car? What if I had apologized after fighting?

Too many "what if's" that can't change anything now.

Eventually James returned and sat back down.

I casually glanced over at him and he would too, but nothing happened.

At one point James said something funny about his job and I found myself smiling and laughing softly.

I looked over to James who was laughing along with everyone. I saw the way his teeth shined, the way his rosy cheeks lifted up to better reveal his beautiful smile, the way his hazel eyes glistened even through the dim room.

Soon enough his gaze met with mine. His eyes doing the talking, telling me that he misses something. He misses me. He misses us. And he's sorry.

I couldn't stand seeing James look at me this way. So I looked away. What's done is done.

He doesn't know that I'm leaving. He doesn't know that I'll be gone by the time he wakes up tomorrow. He doesn't know.

When the ship arrived back at the dock, it was ten. We got off and headed to our cars.

We all drove back to the house. I still wasn't talking. I didn't want to anyways. I simply stared out the window to the stars high in the sky.

We got out of the car the guys joined me as we walked up the stairs.

"Hey!" Kendall bumped his elbow against my arm.

"Hey," I smiled.

"You're awfully quiet."

"Yeah, I'm not feeling it. Sorry."

"It's fine, I'm just messing with you."

I laughed softly and he smiled. "What's wrong?"

"You have to ask?"

We walked inside the house when Kendall grabbed my arm and pulled me into the living room away from everyone.

"Look, I know that it's James. But you have to understand, he still loves you."

"Stop saying that," I demanded throwing my hands in the air. "If he loves me, then he wouldn't have hurt me. He would be here right now—"

"You don't let him do anything!" Kendall talked over me and shut me up for a second.

But that was a dumb thing to say because from my point of view, James never gave me the chance to clarify absolutely nothing.

"I don't let him do anything? He doesn't even let me explain one single thing to him." I said firmly taking a seat on one of the leather couches.

"So that's it then?" he asked.

"Maybe. Maybe it's for the best."

"I guess, but you know James."

"Do I?"

He quickly turned to look at me in confusion. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I don't feel like I know him anymore."

We both stared at each other trying to make sense of what was being said.

"But he's still the same James you knew in New York. He's still the same guy that loves you."

"No, that's what I hoped," I sighed. "But you know, it doesn't even matter," I stood up from the couch and began walking out.

"Why not?" he asked following me.

"Because I won't be here anymore. I'm flying out tomorrow."

"You are?" His green eyes stared at me in shock.

I nodded and held my arm with one hand.

"I have to go pack." I turned away and walked out of the living room.

I walked back to my room and began to pack all my things.

I booked my flight that left around seven in the morning. When I was done packing, I texted my mom explaining everything that I was doing and why I was doing it.

She texted back saying it was okay and that she understood.

I fell asleep with out saying bye to everyone finding it hard to say bye to all of them. If I were to say bye, I would have to explain why I was leaving. And worse, I'd have to explain it to James. And I simply couldn't.

The next morning I was up early packing my last minute things.

I brought everything downstairs and found my mom reading the newspapers in her pajamas with a cup of coffee in her hands sitting on a couch.

"Hey mom."

"Hey sweetie, all set?"

"Yeah I think so."

"Alright, let me get the car keys and we can go."

She got up and walked to the kitchen towards the key holder and grabbed the keys to the car. I'm sure she asked James' mom if she could borrow it and of course she said it was fine.

"Let's go," she was standing outside with my luggage in her hands.

I looked back for one last time to the quiet house illuminated by the rising sun before I turned away and walked outside.

On my way to the airport, we drove in silence. I didn't say anything and neither did my mom.

Once at the airport, I got my boarding ticket and was ready to go through security and board my flight.

"Alright mom, uh, I guess I'll see you soon. I'll take care of the house."

"Thank you sweetheart and no parties." She warned.

"Why would I?" I laughed.

She chuckled. "Get out of here, you're going to miss your flight." She gently pushed me away as I laughed.

"Mom, say bye to everyone for me. I didn't get the chance to thank Cathy and Mike for letting me stay in their house. Just let them know. And tell dad bye for me."

"Don't worry, I will sweetheart."

"Thanks." I hugged her once more before I let go and grabbed my backpack.

I joined the crowd of people who were headed towards security as well. I was officially leaving and nothing could stop me. Nothing could change my mind.

"Ticket," The security guy demanded.

I began to take my ticket out when I heard a faint voice calling my name. I ignored it at first thinking it was just my ears playing games, but then I heard it again.

"Tati!" It sounded similar to James' voice.

I turned around and found him pushing his way through the crowd that separated us.

As he came closer my backpack fell off my shoulders and I felt it hit the ground. I still clung onto the strap as James made his way towards me.

"James," I called out.

"Ma'am, ticket please," The security guard announced again sounding a bit more irritated.

I ignored the man in the suit standing next to the gate and moved out of line to see if it was really James.

The person behind me looked rudely at me, but I didn't care.

All I cared about was the guy standing a few feet away from me.

We both couldn't move. We both didn't move. But what I wanted was to feel his arms wrapped around my waist. What I wanted was to be held in his strong muscular arms again. What I wanted was to be with him.

'You can't go back now.' Those words kept repeating itself through the back of my mind reminding me that I couldn't go back for anything.

So if I couldn't go back, why am I still standing here? If I wanted to be in James' arms then I should be there. After all, you can't go back.

I ran over to him and dropped my bags halfway through my run. I jumped into his arms and he spun me in a circle.

Everything was a flashback. I saw myself only a few weeks ago running into his arms at this same airport and him spinning me around. It was our first hello in a while and now this is our goodbye.

He set me down but held onto me and looked into my eyes.

I couldn't find the words to tell him that I still loved him, but he did it all. He saved me from talking.

He leaned in and pressed his soft pink lips on mine, running his hands through my hair. It didn't matter if I was going to be late for my flight. It didn't matter if people thought we were crazy. It didn't matter if people were looking at us like we were dumb and young, always chasing something. Nothing mattered then, but the fact that I was with him.

'You can't go back now,' I thought.

He pulled away and kept his eyes locked with mine.

"You forgot to say bye." His words brushed softly against my face.

"I know."

"You still don't have to do this."

"I have to. We need time and space."

I saw his chest rise and fall and heard a sigh coming from his mouth.

"If it's what you want."

"It's what we need." I said.

He reached up to tuck a strand of my hair behind my ear. "I love you no matter what."

I swallowed and tried not to cry. "I love you too," my voice cracked and he pulled me in for a long embrace. He soothed my hair and rubbed my back holding me like there was no tomorrow.

"I have to go," I said softly.

"I know." He said.

And that was reality.

I walked to my bag and picked it up. "Bye," I waved back to James who had one hand in his pocket and with the other he waved back.

I got in line and passed through security. Every now and then looking back to James until he was finally out of sight.

It's funny how you think the guy you're with is the one meant for you.

You spend so much time with him and he makes you feel so special only to disappoint you in the end.

I honestly thought James was the one. I thought maybe he was put in my life again for a reason.

But after everything, he was just another guy I had to go through.

He is just another guy on my list, and I never wanted him to be just another guy in my life.

So I depart with the last taste of his lips on mine. I leave Cali with mixed emotions. I leave with a broken heart. I leave still loving him.

But I had to do this. I had to go. I had to give us space and time to think everything through.

And if it's meant to be, we'll find a way back into each other's lives. Only time can tell. Only time will tell.

I walked to the gate and sat down in a chair next to the large window. Outside, I saw planes arriving and departing. I saw the workers throwing the luggage in the planes.

I sighed and dialed Megan's number to call her.

"Hello?" She said.

"Hey, how are you?" I asked.

"I'm good. Just eating breakfast. You?"

"I'm coming home."

There was a pause.

"What?"

"I'm leaving Cali, to come back home. I'll explain everything later. Can you pick me up?"

"Uh, yeah, of course. Tell me when the flight lands."

"It'll land around one."

"Alright, I'll be waiting for you."

"Thanks, see you soon."

I held my phone in my lap and went through my contacts and found James' name.

I smiled with pure sorrow. I was leaving. And I had no idea when I would come back. I had no idea when I would see him again.

This was reality.

The plane arrived and I boarded my flight leaving behind the amazing memories I had on this one trip to California all thanks to one guy.

One guy who never stopped loving me. One guy who never forgot about me. One guy who never forgot about the promise we made as kids.

One guy who never forgot about forever.

One guy named James Maslow.


End file.
